Saturday, 29 September 2012

Smile

Entryway by foundimagination
I know it's the weekend here, so maybe this is a little bit unfair to bring up, but tell me... what do you like best about your job?

For me, I'd have to say it's probably the fact that I seem to laugh every day.

(Even if it's at myself)

What about you?  What's the best thing about your job?





With bonus, unrelated current musical obssession:


Fun.: Carry On (ACOUSTIC)

Friday, 28 September 2012

Nooooooooooo!

Waaaaaaaah!

I was just having the sweetest moment in a dream and then my alarm went off and I couldn't finish the dream! Waaaaah!

It's the second time this month that I've had a sweet dream about making out with a guy. Like not "oooh, sexy sexy" making out, but "aww, we have that connection and it's sweet and I think we're going to kiss now! eeee!"

Both dreams I've been at a party, or at least a social gathering at someone's house. The last one, we were sitting around a table playing a board game or something (I don't know, it was a dream, details don't matter!) and I started speaking French because the good looking guy sitting behind me/next to me was a French speaker and was struggling with the conversation and he thought it was so amazing that I spoke French, he sat down next to me and started stroking my cheek and I was getting all giddy/happy and then I woke up.

This morning, it was another house party and I had a crush on one guy (I think I'd already met him or something) but as the evening (of the party) went on, I came to realize that he wasn't interested in me and was appearing to be interested with this other (much prettier) girl. So I pretended to like his friend so I'd stop feeling crappy about things but then his friend started making out with this other girl and I was crushed. And embarrassed, because the guy I liked kind of gave me a raised eyebrow look when it happened.

So (for whatever reason, again, see "details" above) I went into the kitchen of the house, which was empty (it must have been the end of the party or something) and opened the fridge and sat in front of it looking for something to eat or drink or something.

And as I was sitting there in the empty kitchen, just staring at the fridge, my guy came into the kitchen, sat down with me and held me. We then (in magical dream fashion) talked about how we actually did really like each other and just as we were about to make out in the sweetest, most romantic, awesomest, I'm tingling all over kind of way ?

My alarm went off.

Noooooooooooooooo!

And I snoozed it and desperately tried to get back to the sweetness, but no. It was gone.

So I didn't get to make out with either of those lovely guys who really liked me.

No sweet kisses for me.

Stupid alarm.

Ruins everything.

Thursday, 27 September 2012

My Bed

Weary by foundimagination
This is where I want to be right now.

All comfortable and warm and drowsy in my bed.

Not awake and "alert" and interacting with people, places and things, just nice and asleep in my bed.

Resting. 

Know what I mean? 

I so very much just want to be in bed.  Just for a few days.  Is that oh so much to ask?

And then to get up after those few days and feel rested and have perfectly normal sleeps from then on.

Why is it you can nearly fall asleep all day and then get home and turn off the lights for bed and not be able to sleep?  What's the deal with that?

Le sigh.

I'm tired this week.  In case you couldn't tell.


Wednesday, 26 September 2012

It's Been A While

The first CD I ever listened to was my brother's.  Pink Floyd, The Dark Side of the Moon.

That, and Peter Gabriel's So were the two CDs I remember him having at the time in his room.  He was in boarding school at the time, so we only saw him on weekends, and I missed him and used to go into his room and just hang out.  Guess, at some point I got bored and put on a CD.

Technically, the first CD I ever bought was Led Zeppelin's Houses of the Holy, but that was a used copy, I bought it from a friend, out of his locker.  I seem to remember it was his brother's too.

The first CD I ever bought from a store was Nirvana's Nevermind.  I bought it at A&B sound, which anyone who grew up in these here parts knows as the best music store around.  I don't think it exists anymore, but that's a whole other story really.

I remember how cool it was, but weird at the same time, to be going past the tape sections of the store and to the very small CD section and picking up the CD.  It felt...different.

I made myself a deal at the time, that I would only buy a CD if I knew I liked at least two songs from the album, that would make it worth the sixteen or so dollars I seem to remember them being.

Most of the time if I already liked two songs, the rest of the CD would be good, sometimes better than good, sometimes a bit hit or miss.

After a good long while, eventually... I stopped buying full CDs and started buying tracks, electronically.

And when I realized my CD collection was just gathering dust, literally, in my living room now that I'd transferred everything over to digital format, I packed them up into a box and put them in storage.

Since then, I've bought a few "albums." Entire CDs that I will, strangely enough, never touch.  They're digital figments and it's a very strange thing to have the music, but not the.. container, if you know what I mean.

This weekend was the first time in a long time I, once again, had that feeling of cool and weird all mixed together.

For the first time since Nevermind, I bought an entire album knowing only that I liked two songs on it, and just guessing at the rest.

I was never one of those people who'd go into a record store and sit in the listening booth sampling the songs.  But iTunes does kind of let you do that, and so I listened to the samples of the album, figured I liked it enough and bought the entire thing.

And I like it.  It's good.  And it takes me back to the day when I used to buy a CD and consume it for a few weeks and learn to love the songs and the stories.

It's been neat to do that again, even though I find myself wishing I had something physical to look over and read and file away.

Pre-ordered the new Mumford and Sons too.  Figured I'll love whatever it is they're going to put out enough to give them my money, sight unheard.

Or whatever the equivalent aural saying might be.


Tuesday, 25 September 2012

Again

You Don't See Me, Right?  Right? by foundimagination
I promised myself I'd stop buying books.

If I'm going to try to own a place some day, I need to start being more thoughtful of my budget, and the amount I spend on lovely lovely books could certainly go towards the feeding and care of my future dog, so I told myself I would stop buying books, as much as I love to.

So over the last few months, I've gone through my stockpile of new books and before I head to the library (renewed my card and everything!) I thought I'd maybe re-read some of my favourites that I've kept on my bookshelf.

Which lead me to Watership Down again.  Hence the bunny photo.

It's not quite the same, reading a great book for the second or third or xth time, but it's still good and I'm enjoying spending time with Hazel and his companions again.

Even if I'm aware of where things are going and have a memory of how the book left me feeling the first time I read it, it's still a good story and is still entertaining.  Made me think differently about animals, and humans, for that matter.

I'm not sure what I'll re-read next, something that has a fair chance of surprising me, or at least letting me dive back in to the characters and world all over again.

Monday, 24 September 2012

The More You Know

Sometimes my elbow unlocks my iPhone and opens an app when I have it on the couch next to me.

Sometimes I pick up my iPhone and by the time I've taken a few steps, I've unlocked it and opened an app.

Once I nearly called someone.

Who knew?

Saturday, 22 September 2012

Scratching My Head

Finding My Way Out by foundimagination
Ok, so let's say you're really bored in the movie your husband dragged you to and so you decide to send a few texts to your friend.

Or maybe the babysitter texted to let you know little Billy threw up twice but is asleep now and everything's ok.

I understand, I suppose...if I stretch my understandingness, that sometimes people may need to use their phones to communicate during a movie (even though I remember, back in the day, you young whippersnappers, when we would not be in contact with people when we were out of the house and LIFE WENT ON! but anyway.)

But see, I don't understand why you wouldn't at least silence your phone.

C-Dawg and I were at a movie a while ago and it was this very intense scene. The bad guys had kidnapped the good guys' girl and they were waiting, tensely, to hear from them.

In the movie, the bad guys had just sent an email and then I heard them get a text message too.

Except no one in the movie went to check their phone and I was all, you guys! You're missing a text! What if it's from her?

But then I heard the "someone sent a text sound" and it started to become clear that it wasn't from the movie soundtrack.

No.

It was the woman in the row behind me texting.

Which, as I say, perhaps it was an emergency, but why hadn't she put her phone on silent? It's really easy to do, especially with an iPhone like she had.

Could she not hear the text noises? Could her date/husband/partner?

It just seemed so....un-cool.

I guess I should be grateful no one called her during a sad scene?

Friday, 21 September 2012

Um

I came across a used (?) (certainly not in its package....) condom on the sidewalk yesterday.

My first thought was "EWWWWWW!"

And my immediate second thought was "well, at least they used protection."

I'm trying not to think about it too much.


Thursday, 20 September 2012

I'm Curious

Oh Hai by foundimagination
Here's something I've been wondering.

You know those times when you're asleep, but it's a fairly light sleep? And you're half dreaming and in the dream you stumble on a crack or miss a step and you fall in the dream, and at the same time your leg jumps and you wake up and you're scared because it really did feel like you were falling there?

Well, what happens first? In your brain-like, I mean? Do you have the dream and your brain forgets to tell your leg it's just kidding so it responds as if the situation were real? Or, does your brain listen in on your leg plotting, and finds out that it's going to to a jerk/jump and decides it should make up a story to go along with it so you're not confused and so the brain makes the dream happen to coincide with the leg jump because it's just that awesome?

So.... which is it? The dream causes the leg to twitch or the leg twitch causes the dream?

Wednesday, 19 September 2012

But You Just Haven't Heard It From The Horse's Mouth

Is something still a rumour if it's true?

Like, if my friend tells me our other friend is making her famous ice cream cake for a potluck, but I haven't heard it from the first friend, is it a rumour?

And if the friend who told me is just assuming rather than having heard it for sure for sure, how am I supposed to know? And if it is happening, does that still make it a rumour because now I'm all confused.

But I'd like to know.

Because if it turns out there's no ice cream cake I'm going to cry.

Which takes me back to the initial question that was sparked by this whole ice cream cake fiasco.

Is something still a rumour if it's true?

Tuesday, 18 September 2012

Scientists Would Be Mad At Me

Just by foundimagination
The last couple of months, I've made a lot of positive changes in my life, health wise, and I'm feeling really good for it.

I keep balking at how to talk about it here, but am slowly getting around to it.

What I keep thinking about, though, is the fact that as a scientific experiment, I failed.

I changed too many variables at once, and so have no way of knowing which made the most impact, or if it's all of them combined or what.

Bad scientist, bad.

But yeah.

Good changes, several of them, I feel gooder.

Much.

More to come.

Eventually.

Blog-wise, I mean.

Monday, 17 September 2012

I'm Learning

That when you try to ice your foot? The ice is really really cold.

Like, really.

I think I have the foot equivalent of brain-freeze.

Saturday, 15 September 2012

Whimper

Long Shadows by foundimagination
It's getting to be Dark O'Clock much earlier than it used to, and I have to say, this is my least favourite thing about this time of year.

I don't know why, but it always seems like the short, dark days last a far longer time than the long, light days, like, I'm sure it's about half a year each in this part of the world, but it seems like more.

And, I realize, as I type this, that I should/could probably look it up and find out my latitide sort of thing and maybe I would discover that in fact it is that way but then again, maybe it's not and hey, I'm a spy, not a light-scientist-knower-person.

But, yeah. I think I'm not looking forward to the coming days of it being dark when I wake up and dark when I get home.

I'm making a pouty face.

And sad puppy dog eyes.

Just in case they work.

Friday, 14 September 2012

Play Along At Home!

(Seriously, sometimes I don't know where my mind comes up with these things!)

Close your eyes.

Reach out your left hand and touch something, and wave your right arm around in the air and point to something.

Open your eyes.

Whatever your left hand is touching, put that colour with the name of the thing you're pointing to and it's the title of your first novel, which will, of course, be a bestseller!

Mine?

"Blue Fan."

It's about a girl who follows a group of extreme surfers around the world, documenting their lives, secretly in love with one of them, who, of course, doesn't notice her, and then she ends up murdering him and being in a relationship with the guy's grieving girlfriend.

I have no idea what I'm talking about and it's awesome!

What's your book called?


Thursday, 13 September 2012

Out Of Nowhere

This popped into my head totally, completely out of nowhere, so I figured it was a sign that I had to share it with you.

Ta da!


Aaron Neville And Linda Rondstadt- I Don't Know Much

Wednesday, 12 September 2012

But I Don't Know How

I think I sprained my toe muscle.

Or like a toe tendon.

Is that a thing?

Now what am I supposed to to?

Tuesday, 11 September 2012

Dreamy

The Sky Was Fantastic by foundimagination
It's maybe because I wake up, set my alarm forward an hour and go back to sleep, but my morning dreams are usually pretty vivid, and I tend to remember them. (Possibly because I'm waking up during them.)

Of course, now that I'm sitting down to write about them I can't remember a particular story or scenario, but still, they're generally realistic enough that I wake up wondering what the dream was trying to tell me.

I do remember one where I was sitting in a really old school gym (with the wood panel walls?) and my co-workers were there too, but they were all pregnant, except for me of course. (OK, maybe it was just the female co-workers, duh) And I woke up and realized that, yes, of the gals I work with who are of child-bearing age, all of them are either pregnant or just had a baby or starting to try for a baby, except for me, and so my brain just made them all pregnant and stuck me in the middle of them.

It's frustrating sometimes to wake up from these dreams because often they come when I'm a bit stressed out with things in real life and so the dream's vaguely happy and then I wake up and remember about the not-so happy reality and it's kind of deflating.

But, oh well, what can you do?

The brain will do what the brain needs/wants to do I guess.

(Oh, wait, I just remembered. The one from last morning included something about being at a restaurant and the waitress came out and said such and such a dish had made her ill and then a few other servers were getting sick too and I think that maybe after they got the food poisoning it temporarily turned them into something really bad and so we had to isolate them and then it was like not quite zombie but sort of apocalyptic and then there was a rainbow in a pink sky and maybe lightning?)

Monday, 10 September 2012

Summer's End

It really does feel like summer's starting to wind down.

Like, we had a couple of scorchingly hot days last week that I was completely unprepared for and sweated my way through, even more so than the hot spells we had earlier in the summer. I think because they came in September I had kind of stopped checking out the weather and so didn't prepare myself with the typical windows fully open, blinds fully down sort of protocol and it was a couple of sweaty days and almost too hot to sleep nights.

But I feel like that was probably the tail end of it and while this weekend was still lovely and sunny and warm, I can feel it just slowly edging towards fall.

There are already a ton of leaves fallen, but that, I think, is mainly from the dryness, but a few of the trees are starting to turn slightly orange at the tips too.

I wear a light jacket on the way to work now, but take it off once I get there, but I imagine it'll stay on longer each morning for the next while.

And I didn't throw off the blankets quite as often over the weekend as I did last week, so we'll see.

I'd love the sun to stay, I think we all would, but we'd all have to move to a different part of the world to have that experience, and I think most of us love it here enough to know the gloomier days to come are worth getting through.

I believe Summer goes until the 21st of September, so I'll squeeze whatever I can out of the longer days and the sunshine we get.

I like Summer, but know Fall has its moments too.

Saturday, 8 September 2012

Ahhhh, Weekend

Summer Bokeh by foundimagination
So, what are you going to do with your Saturday?

Nothing? Something? Not sure yet? Totally planned out?

Are you going to hang out with yourself or go meet up with people? Are you going to have a meal out anywhere or just eat at home?

What's the scoop for your Saturday anyway?

Friday, 7 September 2012

What's In A Name

It struck me the other day that I don't often get called by my name.

My family and friends generally call me by a nickname, or a generic moniker like dude, or even just sort of skip over it... "Hey!" or what may be.

And usually in a romantic relationship, one gets referred to as "Babe" or "Sweetie" or something similar.

I realized the other day as I was on a legal type phone call and the lawyer kept saying, "Well, Victoria, " that I don't often hear my name and I wonder if I miss it.

Not that I generally am any different. I'll refer to people by their name when I'm talking about them certainly, but I think when I'm talking TO people, I tend to use a nickname.

I like my name, but I don't get to hear it as much as I like, and when I do hear it it tends to sound formal, which is a bummer.

Know what I mean, or is this just a me thing?

(Oh, and also, I'm sorry to do this, but whenever I think about this, I start singing this. Sorry!)

Thursday, 6 September 2012

Anon

Crusader by foundimagination
Sometimes I want to give up my anonymity on this blog. Sometimes I think about just saying, hey... my name is Sadie and I'm a dental hygenist and I live at 2345 Everywhere Street and just be done with it.

But then I think about it for half a second and realize that, no, I don't. I don't want everyone I know reading my innermost thoughts. And, yes, I have a few friends who read here (at least, they have at some point, I generally don't ask them if they still are, that way I can pretend they don't) but that's by my choice, I pointed them in this direction.

There are a lot of things that are easier for me to write about when I'm writing to an audience of people I don't know personally, or don't interact with on a daily basis.

My brother found my blog not too long ago, and it's meant that I find myself re-considering certain things I'd like to write about. And the experience of knowing a family member might be reading has reminded me why I don't want to have a non-anonymous blog . . . it censors me.

I'm struggling a little bit right now with things I want to talk about, but things I don't, necessarily want, say, my brother, or random co-workers or the guy who signs me in at the gym to hear/read/see. And no, it's not necessarily anything major, but, you know, like... maybe girl stuff or something?

So let me say this... and if we could all just play along, I'd appreciate it, k?

For those of you who think you know who I am, like, for reals? I'm afraid you're mistaken. Even that guy who thinks he's my brother... sorry, your sister asked me to pretend I'm her for a while, but I'm not really. I mean, your sister's name's not Sadie, right? So there. Proof.

My name is, in fact Victoria, and I'm a spy, and that's what we're sticking with and I don't know who you think I am but I'm not. For sure. Really.

Ok?

Cool.

Because I have a few things I'd like to talk about, but my mind is stuck, and I need my cloak of anonymity wrapped back around my shoulders so I can un-stick it.

Losing my anonymity restricts my writing, and it's an uncomfortable feeling.

Wednesday, 5 September 2012

Boooooo

I do not have a good relationship with waking up.

I like being awake, and I like being asleep, but I do not like waking up.

(I should say, that the exception to this rule is when I'm allowed to wake up at whatever-I-want o'clock. Those wake ups and I get along just fine.)

I've come up with a number of ways to try to make the waking up process less painful for me but still, going from horizontal and comfortable to upright and awake is never something I enjoy doing or do willingly.

And even when I tell myself "hey, if I just get up now I'll feel awake and be awake", it doesn't matter. Even though when I do wake up (certainly recently, in these lovely bright summer days) as soon as I'm out of bed I feel alert, I still just want to stay asleep, or have another snooze rest/sleep.

I wish I was one of those people who was easily awake, or who liked waking up or something, but I'm not. I hate waking up and wish it would just leave me alone.

Boo, I say, booo!

Tuesday, 4 September 2012

At Odds

Out And About by foundimagination
I've got that in between feeling again. The one where I feel like I don't belong here, but I'm not entirely sure where I would belong.

I remember feeling like this last summer when Dad was going in for his open heart surgery and we really didn't know if he'd make it through. And although the surgery took place on the mainland, where I grew up, it didn't feel like I was back home.

But, then, coming back here once the surgery was done didn't feel like coming home either. Nothing did, and I put it down to the fact that everything was uncertain and my foundations were shaken.

Maybe that's why I'm feeling like this again now, an emotional flashback to last summer since Dad had to go through something similar, if less life-threatening.

I didn't grow up here, so the friends I have here have only known me as long as I've been here. And when I left home...the place I grew up, I left some good friends, but not a solid group as I'd gone away for a year before high school started and never quite solidly connected with my Grad class group.

So that's perhaps part of it. I don't have deep connections with anyone here, I don't wander around town and see people I went to high school with, or grew up playing hopscotch with or anything like that. My roots aren't here.

Maybe it's also that I don't have a family home here, and my parents have moved a few times since they came over, and are maybe thinking of moving again so there's no real solid home base anymore. And I'm moving too, eventually, so where is home supposed to be?

I imagine that once things settle down again, I'll not feel so displaced. But these moments where I realize I've been here a long while and should be able to feel like I belong here are odd. Discomfiting.

I wonder if it'll ever change, or if home is only ever where you grew up and when it's gone, it's gone.

I don't know.

Monday, 3 September 2012

Happy Labour Day

I think every weekend should be a long weekend. But then I guess we'd all want extra extra long weekends?

Like, suddenly a four day weekend wouldn't be quite enough and, say, hey, why don't we all just get paid for the idea of working? I'd vote for that.

I would solemnly swear to get up five days a week (no, wait, four, this is my fantasty after all and I've already given us all three day weekends as a norm) and think about work.

I could even think about work a couple of times during the day if I had to.

I'd be willing to do that.

Yes, my time of from work has made me somewhat giddy.

Thus, returning to work may be rather more difficult than necessary.

The end.


And because I can't get through a Labour Day without singing this at least once, and it's therefore tradition, here you go. I forgot how much I loved these guys.


Labor Dabor - Homestarrunner

Saturday, 1 September 2012

I'm Not Sure This Post Makes Much Sense

Shadow Leaves by foundimagination
Life is... odd.

You know that old saying "what a difference a day makes"?

Well, I keep thinking "what a difference a year makes."

One of my best friends is moving in with her boyfriend this month, and another good friend of mine is signing off on separation papers in a marriage to a woman he's known and loved for seventeen years.

A year ago, I *know* my guy friend would never ever have thought a divorce would happen to him, and I'm not sure my female friend would have guessed she'd be becoming roommates with her boyfriend. (Although, they were already pretty starry-eyed about each other last summer too!)

I guess with relationships you don't necessarily know where you'll be in a year and I would wish and hope that for all of my friends and loved ones things only ever get better.

This is my second friend I've seen through a divorce and I wouldn't wish it on anyone. It's hard to know what to say or how best to support, but I also know, from watching one friend's relationship blossom, that a year from now things will be different for my friend whose marriage is currently ending.

I don't know how, exactly, but I can hope he's much happier a year from now.

And I hope my gal pal and her guy are happily settled a year from now.

Good surprises only. Happy changes welcome.
Please don't steal stuff from here, it's not nice. But leave a comment, why don't cha? And drink more water. It's good for you.

P.S. If you think you know me? You probably don't. If you're sure you know me? Pretend you don't. I'll never admit I know what you're talking about anyway.

P.P.S. All this stuff is copyright from then til now (Like, 2006-2017 and then some.) Kay? Kay.