Thursday 5 February 2009

To All Sushi Makers


Dear Sirs and Madams,

Let me just start by saying that I love your concoctions.

Almost always.

But, see, I have a little problem.

I can not eat food that looks like food. Which, since it may not make sense to you at first glance, means that I shouldn't be able to recognize the animal that the food came from.

Now, usually with sushi, this isn't a problem as I tend to order little rolls of things that don't look anything but cute!

Um, except for that unagi roll. You know, the one that's actually one thing, but because thinking about what it *really* is gives me the heebie jeebies, I just call them "chicken" rolls? (And insist everyone around me calls them chicken rolls) Yeah, them. I usually like my chicken unagi rolls, but that one from last night? Gave me not only the heebie jeebies but the oh holy lordy I can't eat any of these because I can see the legs! Legs and sticky parts and why didn't they cut those off? Why must they be hanging out of the roll as if they want to swim away or wave at me or possibly just get stuck in my throat?

So please, I'd really appreciate it if you could just make sure that my sushi doesn't, you know, look like anything that was ever once alive.

That'd be awesome.

And if you could pass this on to the guy who makes calimari to remind him that calimari should never ever come to my plate looking like a breaded mini-octopus? That'd be great.

Yours so disturbedly that I had to post the most neutral photo I could find just to counteract the heebie jeebies,

Victoria


P.S. Y'all, I know I'm changing the subject rapidly from yesterday's post, but that's ok. Ok? Kthxbye

8 comments:

Photorookie said...

Interesting theory, I can't eat any sushi or anything of that sort anyways. Reminded me of the story of the mcdonalds mcnugget that looked like a chickens head - yuck!

Ms Behaviour said...

You know that soy sauce has gluten in it, right? You'll have to substitute it out with more wasaaaabi.

Anonymous said...

I don't mind food that looks like it came from an animal.. but I went through Chinatown earlier this evening and was reminded that, much as I like crispy duck, I do prefer it if it comes WITHOUT the head still attached..

Victoria said...

Photorookie, I don't even want to think about what that McNugget story might mean!

EB, I do :)

Dominic, that's just the kind of thing that makes me never want to eat food again! ;)

Ms Behaviour said...

A friend told me last night that Tamari soy sauce is gluten free. I just googled gluten free soy sauce and it looks like there are actually a bunch out there, including Wal Mart's brand, if you don't have any objections to shopping there. If you do, check out T&T next time you're in Vancouver and I'm sure you'll find something there that's gluten free. I'm going for egg-free, dairy-free crepes this morning ;)

Victoria said...

EB, know what's weird? That's the brand I have at home right now but that I bought MONTHS ago and I have no idea why I bought it. Weiiiiird! :)

Hope you enjoyed your "free" crepes! ;)

Yvonne said...

There are some seriously creepy looking asian foods!
My ex's grandma was in Japan and had a freak-out when the barbequed prawns she ordered started walking around on her plate!
Food should not have eyes or tendrils or any such appendages. Or move on its own!

Victoria said...

OH NO!!!! Walking around? NOOOOOOOO!