Thursday, 20 August 2009

Ladies Only

Gentlemen, you may want to skip this post entirely. Just sayin'.

I was in for my yearly physical last week (oh joy of joys, um, no) and as the doctor was getting things set down below she said "Hmmm, sorry, this must be hurting you." I just kind of nodded, as my focus was completely taken up with remembering to breathe and thinking of my happy place (which was pretty much anywhere but there.) It wasn't until I got home that it hit me. Why aren't we lobbying for a two drink minimum before we even let them get going? Shouldn't we be allowed to *not* feel what all's going on down there?

Anyone want to sign my petition?


Blogger Ms Behaviour said...

Ha. Two drink minimum indeed. I mean, that's my rule on dates. Should be the rule for my gyno too!

Anyway, I always take the rest of the day off and treat myself to something. Brownies, ice cream, bubble tea, whatever. Something to get me through the ordeal beyond just thinking of the beach in Dominican. My exams are always painful because my cervix is tilted which, God help me, apparently makes it difficult to insert a speculum.

Thursday, August 20, 2009 9:23:00 am  
Anonymous Dominic said...

I'll sign your petition if you extend it to dentistry as well :o)

Thursday, August 20, 2009 10:46:00 am  
Blogger Bunny said...

Count me in - what a wonderful idea!!

Thursday, August 20, 2009 10:49:00 am  
Blogger Mark said...

Like dating, if you can't rely on them to provide your minimum alcohol content, pre-drink.

Thursday, August 20, 2009 3:23:00 pm  
Blogger Laura said...

I'm pretty sure that all doctors offices should have a fully stocked, open bar on site.

Thursday, August 20, 2009 4:41:00 pm  
Blogger Victoria said...

Ms B, it totally should be the rule. And I like your "rest of the day off" plan. I've never had a problem before (well, not like this anyway) and the doc said "oh, your cervix is hiding" and I was all... HUH? Well NO WONDER with you all poking around down there!

Dominic, no problemo!

It would help, wouldn't it Bunny? ;)

Mark, I actually thought about that at the time. But by then it was too late, I was already there! Heh.

Laura, seriously, right? :)

Thursday, August 20, 2009 5:11:00 pm  
Blogger the one in the back said...

Not really sure if insurance will cover that 2 drink minimum ;-) If it were universal healthcare coverage tho, that would be one hell of a bar tab.
I'll sign your petition so long as you're willing to tip your doctor =)

Thursday, August 20, 2009 9:02:00 pm  
Blogger Victoria said...

Can you imagine the bar tab? lol

Thursday, August 20, 2009 9:05:00 pm  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I am in. Show me the dotted line. Please also add the two drink minimum to brazilian waxes.

Thursday, August 20, 2009 11:33:00 pm  
Blogger Victoria said...


Friday, August 21, 2009 4:19:00 pm  
Anonymous Jasmine said...

I like to make awkward comments when My Gyno is doing his work.... like, "so... you must HATE your wife's vagina after looking and them all day...."
He just laughs at least it makes me feel better!

Saturday, August 22, 2009 7:21:00 am  
Blogger Victoria said...

D'oh! lol

Saturday, August 22, 2009 10:15:00 am  
Blogger The Amazing Trips said...

I'd definitely sign that petition. I think it's one of the most brilliant things I've ever read.

When you sign in and are waiting for the doctor to call you back, the receptionist could serve up your first drink ... and just before the nurse takes your blood pressure and weighs you ... you could chug down your second.

Of course, you could also carry a flask with you. Which I just might do when my next appointment rolls around...

Saturday, August 22, 2009 8:21:00 pm  
Blogger Victoria said...

Amazing, that's totally how it should go, you've got it perfectly timed out! ;)

Saturday, August 22, 2009 8:55:00 pm  
Anonymous Kara said...

Where's the dotted line???

Monday, August 24, 2009 9:02:00 am  
Blogger Victoria said...


Monday, August 24, 2009 7:39:00 pm  
Blogger D said...

i am in total agreement!

Monday, August 24, 2009 9:37:00 pm  
Blogger Victoria said...


Monday, August 24, 2009 9:45:00 pm  

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