Ordinarily I'd be saying "how is it the 21st of the month already?" but I feel like I know how this month went by. As in, I don't feel like this month rushed. Or something not quite tangible makes me feel like I'm not surprised by the date. I've had a weirdly difficult few weeks. On top of an extremely difficult last month.
I'm wearing a holter monitor as we speak. It's a device that measures heart activity, like an extended ECG. It's annoying and I'm finding the sticky things that hold the ... measury things (leads? I dunno, I could google, but then you'd lose out on googling yourself!) super irritating and I figure I'll have some skin irritation there when it comes off, but it's more the tag to take it off that's rubbing, well, on my boobs... because, as you can maybe imagine, there are some sticky things under my boobs.
There are five altogether, which is fine, and a device that's doing the reading that I'm wearing on a belt loop thing. I feel strangely scared to do anything not because of upsetting my heart but because I'm scared of the thing falling off or bumping it and pulling out the wires or something.
Probably by the time you read this it'll be off me already and I'm aware my heart might not do anything of note while I have it on and I suppose a pretty normal reading is the best bet here.
Insert a joke here about hearts and Valentine's day if you wish...
3 comments:
Wait, it's the 21st already (checks) ... GODDAMMIT.
Trying desperately to think of a wisecrack about hearts, but all I can think of is the band "Heart", and their epic cover of "Mona Lisa's and Mad Hatters" (search for it on YouTube). Dammit - now I'm going to have to go listen to it myself.
Whoops, sorry Jason!!!
Jonathan, I was thinking something along the lines of "are they checking to see if you have a heart since you were single on Valentine's Day HA HA HA!" You know.. something like that.
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