Hmm...

So I just chatted with a plant person.  She had me send photos of my (EVEN MORE!) dying plants, and I explained some of what I think has been going on.

She said they looked cold, over watered and not getting enough light.

Which... makes sense.

I've been spending a lot of time at Jason's the last few months (he's going through some stuff and I've been supporting him and he's been feeding me so... yeah... some post for some other time I'm sure) and so I've not been home all that much.

She said that me not being there will be reducing the moisture in the air (cuz I'm not breathing I suppose?  Or cooking/showering too maybe?) and the air flow.  And that if I've been keeping my blinds closed to keep heat in (which I have) that will be reducing the light... which duh... why did I not think of that! 

I'm also pretty sure that when I do hang at home long enough to look over my plants, I've been seeing that they're dry so I HUGE water them and I think this is the main problem with them rotting and dropping leaves.

So... I'm working on some solutions (including being home more and/or at least paying more attention).  Jason has suggested I put a pot of water out on my stove (not turned on, just... out) to put some moisture into the air... I'm going to keep my blinds up, or at least half opened, and I'm going to try to lightly water more often.

I'm halfway through losing another plant almost certainly but I think/hope (?) I've saved a couple.

My spider plants haven't noticed a thing so... yay for that.

But yeah, I'm having a hard time with it and then I feel silly that I'm this upset over losing my plants.

But I know it's my fault and my negligence and I'm not allowed pets where I live so these are my only living things in my place and I'm sad.

I've even, over the years, learned which ones I'm better with and which I'm not, so to lose these ones feels like an even bigger "failure".

My friend did point out that these plants are all (except for my babies that I grew myself!) grown in greenhouses and not really expected to live all that long but I'm not going to accept that!  I just have to be aware that even if I'm just out of my place for a while longer than I'm used to, it may be a much larger change for my sweet little plants.... especially in winter.