When It's More "Expected"

There have been some other tangential deaths in my life since Jay passed.

One was a neighbour's Grandma, another a friend's partner's Aunt.

I know it's not just me, but there is a slightly less shocked feeling when the person is older.  Not that death is ok.  Not that mourning doesn't occur.  It's just someone in their 20s-30s-40s dying is less expected than someone in their 70s-80s-90s.

We all cope with and deal with death all our lives.  Just some of us more than others, and some of us sooner and more often than others.

I would like for there to be another long pause for deaths in my life, but I'm also aware that the older I get the more it will occur and I'm not ok with that, but that is fighting against a life truth and not a fight ever to be won.