Not

The last two weeks for me have been a lot of not.

I did *not* force myself to go to the gym when my body 1. needed rest and 2. was healing from stitches.

I did *not* force myself to write blog posts when my brain was content doing whatever other small thing I was relaxing doing.

I know that that's only two things but it was more than that and even those two things repeated a handful of times over a week or two feels like it added up.

It feels like/felt like I needed to rest.  That I was allowing myself to rest.  And so far I'm glad I did.

I am a little bit nervous that I may not jump back into going to the gym since the only thing I enjoy about the process is being done... which makes it something I do not at all look forward to anymore (which is a big bummer.) But that's not a today problem.  We'll see how I feel at the end of this week.  But I am tired.  And low energy and low mood and it's ok that I took the time and gave myself the grace to rest.  (Not that I did nothing, I just didn't push myself to do the hard hard things.)