Another Realization

For Christmas day this year I will be seeing much of my family and so I wanted, since I'm trying to learn, to bring some baked goods I'd made myself.

I looked up a couple of new-to-me muffin recipes and while it seems risky to try a new recipe I might just make us some chocolate chocolate chip muffins (cross your fingers for me?) but I also thought of doing a slightly less sweet muffin and maybe some of the cookies I've been making and then I started to think about storage and how I wouldn't want the muffins to be frozen but also wouldn't want them to be too many days old and as I was sort of trying to think and plan my way through all this, with the aim of the morning of the 25th it hit me that this is what some people, mainly women/mothers, have to figure out every year.  And that must be exhausting for many!

I know that lots of people love baking or making things for people and I know that cooking in general is not a great thing for me, but I guess I've been innocent and naive enough all these years to not think about all the coordination that might have to go in to making and gifting baked goods.  

I mean sweet treats you're good to wrap and gift at any time (within reason) and cookies are probably safe enough for that too so maybe it's partially my choice of trying muffins but when I was trying to plan it blew my mind to think I might be spending all of the day of the 24th baking and baking and how that did NOT sound like fun for me!

So what am I going to do?  Well I'll probably try for the chocolate muffins on the 24th as I don't currently have any real plans for that day and if I want to bake another kind I'll maybe try them the day before, or not.  Will I also do cookies?  Unknown.

I did make banana muffins and my cookies for MYSELF last week and threw some into the freezer so I do have a small number of cookies I could take as is.... but yeah, this whole cooking and baking and making things stuff is a lot, eh?  (Especially when it's not really your thing!)

Well, I Mean I Don't Have A Boat Either?

A couple of wind storms ago the lights in my place were flickering a lot.  We didn't end up losing power, but I did start to look for things in case we did.  And that's when I discovered I didn't have a lantern on hand.

Sure, I have flashlights and a head-lantern (although I think I am going to get rid of it as it has some kind of loose connection and so flickers which is not at all helpful or ok).

So this weekend I was in a hardware type store and was looking at their lantern section when a young guy asked if I needed any help.  I said no, I was just debating about lanterns in case of a power outage situation.

He pointed to one and said "that one floats!" and I, confused why I'd need this/aka why he had suggested it said "in case I'm in the bath?" he said something about "well if there's a flood or something", which again, not really something I'm worried about... having light in a flood situation? But I do know that he was just trying to be helpful and now I am hoping I didn't come across mean or anything I just thought it was funny that I was thinking about being home with no power and he was like "that one floats!"

Maybe I wish I could have just said "cool" and moved on but honestly my brain was trying to envision me in a dark bath with a flashlight floating next to me.  I don't know man my brain just does stuff!

But yes, if you want a floating flashlight I know where you can get one!

Ha! Today I Learned!

From time to time I struggle with sore things in my mouth.

Knock on wood I'm not talking about teeth (oh please no) but like roof of mouth and gum based stuff.

I tend to have problems in those two areas - the roof of my mouth, and the gums, uh... gums of my teeth?  (Weird way to put it but unsure how else to say it!)

Last month I was dealing with really painful mouth sores.  I kept trying to heal them but my usual things weren't seemingly helping.  And usually when these mouth sores pop up I immediately stop using my toothpaste in case that's irritating it (I had to switch to a new toothpaste about a year ago due to tooth sensitivity and yes, that "tooth sensitivity" toothpaste really does help, and my dentist is one of those x out of 10 dentists who recommend it, although I assume not on tv!)  It then occurred to me that maybe, just maybe the toothpaste itself could be one of those things that was bothering my gums, so I did some research and sure enough there is an ingredient in many toothpastes (called SLS... it causes lather) that can cause gum irritation and/or sores for some people.

So... I searched, and that brand makes a few toothpastes that still have all the good things I need/want in them but not that particular ingredient and so I'm hoping that that is a helper and while it's only been a few weeks, so far so good I think? (Knock on so much wood.)

After my last dental cleaning (last week?  two weeks ago?  well, recently anyway) I noticed the roof of my mouth got irritated and I was not happy about this (I'm not saying the one caused the other but it is possible that it did, just not certain.... the roof of the mouth issue might be from like being scraped, think like "sharp" food etc?)  The roof of mouth sore is, well sore, and so I tried to figure out ways to help it go away.

Because I don't know the cause or what exactly it is (it's not always there so I can't guarantee it will be there when I go to the dentist to like show them) I don't know how to help it get better.  But I found a couple of things that were recommended and I went and got them and then last night I went to use them.

I probably should have done a bit more research but I didn't, and so I didn't know that the things I bought were essentially numbing creams!

I found THAT out when I followed the directions and dabbed a "pea sized" amount on the sore and then accidentally got some on my tongue (because tongues are SO curious they just gotta check stuff out!) which transferred to my lip and I was like OOoooOOooh this is the stuff my dentist rubs on my gums before he puts the needle in so that I don't "feel" the poke of the needle!  Yeah, I unknowingly bought numbing cream.   Which, just to be real, wore off quite quickly, despite the warning to not eat for an hour after applying.  Sigh.

So yeah, these creams won't actually help the issue get any better like I'd hoped, they'll just freeze/numb the area for a bit so that the pain is less.  And it's not that I don't appreciate that but the only time I really REALLY need the area not to hurt is when I'm eating and something I bite might rub against it (OW) and I'm not supposed to eat when I've put it on (I do not want to imagine feeling that numbing going down my throat etc!) it's kind of... not helpful?  At least for me and my situation?

I'll check the expiry dates and see about maybe returning one, but also I can't be bothered to go into stores right now if it's not really highly needed so we'll see.

But yeah, today I learned that the stuff my dentist uses to temporarily freeze/numb my gums is not some magically kept secret, I can literally buy a version of it off the shelf, who knew!? 

(Well people in dental pain probably knew to be fair?)

I get that this was maybe only a funny "aha" moment for me!

The Inevitable Passage Of Time

There are several young people in my life and while many of them are on the mainland (kids of high school friends and such), my brothers' kids and C-Dawg's kid I see the most of, either in person or via photos and updates from their folks.

Because I talk to C-Dawg the most, I hear the most updates about her kiddo and, well he just got his full driver's licence.  (One of my nieces is of similar age so she's likely next, I assume.... brothers aren't great at telling me things!) This is... crazy.  C-Dawg and I are both struggling with this life fact (her more than me I'm sure) and all that it entails.

For me, my biggest *oh shit* moment was seeing my two youngest nieces the other week and the youngest really suddenly looks like a teenager.

Like that switch has happened from "kind of still a kid, maybe slightly a pre teen" to "that's a teenager".  And I'm slightly devastated.  I teared up when I saw her, and told her that was my right as her aunt and how lovely she looks etc etc and it hit me later that all those "aunt jokes" I heard growing up are like totally legit and true.

(I didn't have that experience of having aunts and uncles around growing up, for what it's worth - child of an immigrant and all that....)

I legitimately did the whole "you've gotten so BIG!" thing when I saw her and while I didn't pinch her cheeks, I do understand how when you don't see a young person every day there can be a really sudden and shocking change and the intense urge to say something about it is where, I assume, the jokes come from.

So yeah, at this time, I don't really have any more youngsters in my life, and no, no one is to mention the possibility of being a great aunt one day (JUST SHUSH!) and while I'm excited to see this next stage of all of their lives (post high school choices, driving or not, relationships, heartbreaks, jobs, careers, marriages maybe? etc etc) I'm also sad and missing the younger days.  Maybe especially around this time of year when picking out a gift for a youngling was a special delight. 

But yeah, my babies are all grown up.  (Although not really, as we all know....) And that's a little bit heartbreaking.  (And somewhat terrifying, quite honestly, that we let 17 year olds be behind the wheel OMG!)

The Pre Game (I Guess?)

Sometimes (like right now, as it's Sunday morning as I'm writing this) I don't want to go to my water fitness class because although I'm kind of ok with the idea of doing the exercise (and getting that out of the way for the day) I don't feel like chit chatting or being small talk friendly with people. 

But what I've noticed, is even on those days (and I can tell myself that I don't 'have' to interact that there are ways to politely avoid that) I usually do end up giving a smile or a nod or a wave or even a quick "how are you" kind of chat and I always feel fine or good after.  So it's like this pre-anticipatory assumption of  dislike that then doesn't really happen?

Brains are weird man, I tells ya!

Whoops! Well That Was Unexpected!

I've mentioned before that I love trying to plan returning one book to the library right as my next book is ready for pick up.

I'm usually pretty good at the timing and can monitor how quickly or slowly I'm going through a book and so when I'll finish the one I'm on and the biggest "issue" is finding a book that I can actually get put on hold with no issue and then seeing which branch it's going to be coming from and trying to factor that in to the timing!

I'm also avoiding books that have lots of holds on them as I don't like the pressure of not being able to renew and I never know how long a book is going to take me so it's just a combo I try to avoid! (But most of the books I want right now have huge hold numbers on them, d'oh!)

Well imagine my surprise when I picked up a new book yesterday (based off of a movie I saw on Netflix*) and whipped through like 10 chapters in one night!  I was shocked as it was happening and it's not the thickest of books so I may have to order my next book like pretty much the day after I started one!  (Which is crazy.)

I'm not sure why I'm going through this one so quickly as the writing is not overly simplistic so maybe I just really enjoy this writer and I'm debating trying another of his books sight unseen to see if that's the case!

But yeah, whipping through this book, it's kind of crazy, I wonder what tonight will hold!

*The book/movie is "Leave the World Behind" by Rumaan Alam

The Decision

So I ended up writing Christmas cards to the UK (my relatives) and the US (my friends) and not to local (not yet anyway and probably not at all unless I'm seeing them in person.)

And yes, I put them in a post box.  I'm not sure that was a great idea but it's the choice I made!

I also, the next day, addressed a card to myself and wrote the date inside and threw that in a box and I"m really genuinely curious when it will arrive (assuming it does!)

I wrote in all the cards that we have a postal strike and so I didn't know when it would arrive but happy 2025 if the holidays have already passed?

I feel badly for all who are being impacted by this strike and I still do miss checking for mail and I hope the workers get what they are needing.

By the way, I still find writing cards pretty stressful and not really all that enjoyable, and this year I had a really frustrating time because I had bought small, cute cards to send to the UK (where we say Happy Christmas rather than Merry Christmas so these cards said the former) and I bought this year's holiday stamps and I didn't look at the size of the stamp before I put the addresses on the cards and when I went to put the stamps on they COVERED MY ADDRESSES (well the last half of everyone's last name anyway) and it looked terrible and I tried writing on the stamp but that smudged and I got so upset I nearly threw them all away but each stamp was nearly $3 and that felt wasteful (although hopefully supportive of the flailing Canada Post in some way) so I re did two of them and before I could change my mind and throw them out, I put them all in a mail box and, well, we'll see what happens eh?

(I don't think it's going to resolve soon and not even sure if I will resolve before the new year at this point!)

Hey Hey!

So at the aqua fitness classes, since I've been going solidly for a few months now, the "regulars" are pretty friendly and that's a nice surprise I wasn't expecting.  

I also really enjoy the (good) songs that some of the instructors use and so will happily sing along when I can (I'm not the only one!)

Before class last week, I was floating around and a Monkees song was playing and I was quietly singing along.  After a bit one of the ladies looked at me and said, in a friendly manner "Victoria, aren't you too young to know this song?"

I think I stammered in my response and said something about having older brothers but I also suppose it was a flattering sort of question but also I do like a lot of music that you might say is from a generation or two above mine and that's totally ok!

So we talked for a bit about the Monkees and Pink Floyd (she said how surprised she was when her son started listening to them and she said to him "but that's MY music!?") and I said that in high school I listened to the "golden oldies" station on the radio (I really did, I loved me that sweet stuff from the 50s and what have you!). And then class started and I sung along to the ones I knew and it was fun fun fun til her daddy takes the t-bird awayyyyy! (Whoops, sorry, got distracted there.)

But yeah, it's kind of a neat thing to share music with folks a good bit older than me.  Sometimes I think music can be a great uniter, you know?

But I also thought, after I got home that day, that I likely heard many of these songs on the radio growing up and that my parents would have chosen the station so it was more likely my parents rather than my brothers who guided my initial love of music from "before my time" you know?

The Grand Experiment!

I know we're not in to the coldest part of Winter yet (we're actually in meteorological winter but in real life it's still fall for a bit) so none of this may work or be valid in a month or so but.... I'm running an experiment with my blankets!

Last Winter, I bought some fleece blankets (that Jason had already bought so I knew how effectively warm they were) on a really good boxing day sale and I put them away.  Last Spring, I bought a "summer weight" duvet and packed away my other one.  

When I bought the "summer" type duvet my plan was that around now-ish I'd swap it out for my winter stuff and pile on the blankets as usual.

But the duvet (silk, go figure) has been fine so far and so all I've thrown on it was my weighted blanket (my brother got me a few years ago) and a couple of nights I've put another blanket on top of that.

But I kept thinking about that fleece one I bought and wondering if I should do a grand swap of everything but that seemed like more effort than I had in me so I folded up the "other" blanket and put the fleece on top of the weighted which was on top of the duvet.  (Following?)

This has been fine?  But I started to wonder if I could make it even more heat capturingly effective, and I wasn't sure the weighted blanket on top of the duvet was a good idea so this weekend I randomly decided to switch things up!

I have a small version of the fleece blanket that I've used a couple of times on my couch over my regular couch blanket (what, I like to be covered, it's cozy!) and it's really good as a layer like that (almost too good right now at this milder time of year!) so I wanted to try to maximize its layering abilities in bed too.

So I readjusted my bed to have sheet, weighted blanket, fleece and duvet on top.  I was really curious to see how cozy it might be (and secretly worried I'd not notice any difference).  When I got in to bed that night I knew I couldn't have the texture/weight of the weighted blanket RIGHT against me, it just didn't work so I got up, stripped the bed again and put sheet, fleece, weighted blanket and duvet in that order.

Well, having a fleece on top of a sheet is quite lovely to begin with!  And the rest seemed to work out fine but I don't think it was particularly cold this weekend and so I can't really say if it was more effective or what?

But I think that even if it's not "OMG AMAZING!" I still like the idea of the duvet not being squished by the weighted blanket, I don't know.... I assume that's a thing?

So yeah, once we hit a stretch of brrrrr cold, I'll see if my current blanket experiment is successful or if I need to switch things up again.

Science, am I right? (heh)

Aaaahhhhhhh Sleep

I love good sleep.

It's, without exaggeration, life changing for me.  Maybe for you too, but I know we're all built differently so I'm not assuming.

When I was a teen (and probably before, I don't really know) I could sleep in like nobody's business.

Like I'm talking sleeping in til 11 or later.  Maybe I was staying up late those nights, again, I don't really remember, I just know that I am, or was, fairly well known for being a late sleeper.  I may have even told you the story of my best friend's Dad who'd get fed up of me still being in bed during sleepovers and would open the door and throw a wet facecloth on my face to wake me up!  C-Dawg's Dad used to grumble at me about how I was wasting half the day, but sleep.... mmmm.... delicious sleep.

A number of years ago (I'm sure I talked about it here at the time) I worked hard to change my sleep patterns so that my mornings weren't a rush.  Instead of getting up and needing to leave in half an hour or so I now get up with over and hour before I need to leave.  A couple of weeks ago I even moved my alarm back another ten minutes.  Crazy! (For me, anyway.)

I do find I like having the mornings awake, it really does extend the day and I do like having lots of down time before I need to leave for work rather than feeling stressed and rushed.  But I also sometimes miss sleeping in, or hitting snooze...

My sleep can get hit or miss and of late I've been sleeping ok but not feeling rested and so two or three weekends ago I decided to let myself sleep in as much as I wanted on a Saturday (the only day I don't have a class at the pool I want to get to.)

Y'all?  It was delightful.  I half woke up and let myself just fall back asleep and be all warm and cozy and dozy for as long as I wanted.

I was so pleased with myself and it wasn't even all that late, relatively speaking.  (I think I got up around 9:30 which is decadent but nothing compared to my high school days!)

But..... then my sleep was terrible for the next week.  UGH.

Sure, maybe the two things are unrelated but it sure seemed that they were.

It's the same with naps.  If I'm sick I can nap and still sleep, but napping during the day the rest of the time is dangerous and can and most likely will mess up my sleep schedule.

And because the difference for me between a good sleep and a meh/not great sleep is really night and day (no pun meant) I have to put more value on maintaining my night time sleeps as best I can.

Sometimes acupuncture is needed to reset whatever in my system is off and that's what happened last week... an acupuncture session followed by some of the first good sleeps I've had in weeks.

I feel like a whole new person on the days I wake up having really, actually slept.  Sure, there could be other factors but my point is.... I really really love and need good, solid sleep.  And I think I'm willing to sacrifice intense sleeping in and most naps to try to get it.

So while that one sleep in felt great at the time, I feel like I paid for it over the next week plus and so I don't think I'll go quite that wild again.

I do still "sleep in" a little on non work days by not having my alarm set, but with my blinds half open, and lately, with the construction going on next door I'm usually awake within an hour and a half of a work day vs the three or so I did that weekend.

TL;DR? -  Good sleep is gooooooood.

A Little More In

I don't quite know how or when but a number of years ago I stopped putting anything up for Christmas at all.  (The holiday my family has traditionally celebrated at this time of year since there are several around this time of year!)

I think it was probably partly that it can all be/feel like too much and also my own internal struggles I suppose.

This year, again, I'm not sure why, I felt like doing a little something more festive.  (While still trying hard not to get overwhelmed and stressed by the felt pressures of the season and expectations.)

So I got myself some little battery powered mini lights that I put up around my window that turn on at dark and off when I head to bed (they have a 6 hour "timer").

Then I got myself a little mini battery powered ceramic tree that I light up when I feel like a little bit of colourful happy.

And I got an external DVD player so I can watch Christmas movies on my laptop (they took the internal DVD player out several iterations ago).

When I was looking for the DVDs (they're actually all our family favourites I bought my parents years ago but they gave away, I think because they don't have a DVD player anymore?) to bring out, I found a door hanging display that I forgot I bought, I think last year.

So it's feeling really nice to be wanting to see some visual Christmas things around my space and to put up things that may bring a smile to others.  (I have a few neighbours who put up something on their door for various times of year and it's always nice.)

It feels like something in me shifted, or softened, or whatever metaphor you want to use and so I have a few small happy making Christmas things around.

And I was able to find, a bit last minute, a "cheap" advent calendar for the month... the one tradition I never did let go of.  (And by "cheap" I mean it cost less than $2 rather than the upwards of $12 ones that seem to have taken over this year!  I just want me my fake plastic chocolate shaped like a star!)

I'm Just Rolling With It!

The older fellow at my aqua fitness class is still calling me Deb, which is so sweet that I haven't the heart to correct him so he'll say "Hi Deb!" and I'll just respond with "Hi [his name]" and we'll chat a bit and I mean I know how hard I have to work to remember the handful of names there that I do remember and I'm still trying to figure out who *actual* Debra (Deborah?) is (I think I know and she's been away) or if there even is an actual Deb/Debbie/Debrorah in the group/class but I feel like he got the name from somewhere and has just attached it to the wrong person, you know?

It's not all that high stakes in there for me to insist he gets my name right but I'm assuming at some point it'll get worked out, eh?  And I've also just remembered that he's mentioned not being able to see (needs glasses which he, like myself, doesn't wear in the pool) so it's even more likely he's just confusing my fuzzy to him face with someone else's similar looking fuzzy to him face and that's ok enough.

Yours,

"Deb"

Thanks Tech!

I was saved by my cell phone and a maps app after work this week!

I don't work in an area that I know well at all.  It's about 15-20 km away from where I live and just not a place I go that often so I don't know it to drive around it (whereas where I live and where I used to work I could get around pretty well, far more familiar.)

I take the highway *out* to work but on my way home I want to relax a bit more than I want to be speedy so I take a back route.  

Well earlier this week, I was heading home and my turn to that back route was blocked.  Which I didn't know until I got up to it.  At which point I am essentially lost.

The route I take is right on the edge of more rural land and again isn't an area I know and so it's not as if I knew to just take X road up ahead to get to Y.  I had absolutely no idea and didn't see a street up ahead to turn on to.  So I turned on to some other street and pulled into a parking area.

And this is where it is a delight to have modern technology on hand as I was able to pull out my phone and type in my home address and hit "go" and follow those directions to get myself home.

Now I have never driven on any of those roads before (even though I vaguely know at least some of their names) and I'm not sure I will again and it was likely quite a round about way to get home but I made it home and I'm happy I didn't have to dig out a map book (I do still have one though) and figure it out that way!

So thanks to technology for stepping in and stepping up when I suddenly found myself "in the middle of nowhere" (not really) and didn't know how to get myself back home. 

Do The Thing

I was walking home from something the other day and in front of me was a Dad and his toddler daughter.  Or perhaps slightly older than toddler, I'm not really sure what age that encompasses.  Let's say she was around three?

As they were walking along ahead of me they walked by a small puddle and that little girl made SURE to STOMP with her pink wellington boots in that puddle to make a SPLASH and kept on walking and it struck me as this great reminder to do the thing that makes you happy.  See the tiny puddle and STOMP in it.  Enjoy that splash.  

We all know we start to miss things as we "grow up" and we all know kids can remind us to see the joy in the small things so lets let this little girl remind us to just DO the thing(s) that are fun and enlivening.

Go swing on a swing, or stomp in a puddle (with the correct rain gear!), or whatever your heart would like to do but your brain maybe forgets to do because you're so busy thinking about whatever other thing is in your mind.

Stomp y'all.  Stomp real good!  Why else are puddles there if not to be splashed in with your pink boots!?

D'Oh!

(Well it seems that so far this week I'm sharing a series of small mishaps from my life because here's another!)

If you have one of those new fangled (ish... I guess they've been around a while now) key fobs where you press a button to lock/unlock your car, you'll probably have experienced when the battery starts to go.

I've been noticing that my car fob needed to get closer and closer to unlock or lock my car so I went ahead and re-watched the video tutorial (I've done it before but forget the exact method) and grabbed the replacement battery (yay me for having one on hand!) out of my "junk" drawer and I replaced the battery in my key fob WOO HOO!

The next morning I went out to my car to go to work and I was pretty sleepy from a poor night's sleep and so it was annoying that my fob wasn't opening my car as I got closer and closer.  Until I was right next to my car and it still wasn't opening it which is when I realized that I hadn't CHECKED that battery replacement the night before and it apparently was a dead battery, ARGH!

Y'all?  In all the years I have owned my lovely car, I don't think I've ever used the key to get in or out!

I started to get a little panicky (see above re not a good night's sleep so not super strong in the thinking department) and I ran back upstairs for my secondary fob, upon which I had put a note saying "slightly broken" and in my frazzled state I thought this meant it didn't work at all (found out later that night that it did but didn't think to test it at the time) so I thought to google how to get in to my car without the key fob, AND I grabbed ANOTHER replacement battery (I had two, who knew) and the two screwdrivers I needed and threw them in my lunch bag to deal with at work.

So out I went again to my car and worried that I might accidentally set off the alarm (that I also don't know how to turn off if I don't have my fob working and can't get IN to the car to start it... I think starting it turns off the alarm???) I put the key into the lock and turned and.... nope.  Door wouldn't open.  Tried again.  NOPE!  OMG.  I started to freak out (quietly).  Would I have to call in sick because I am literally unable to get in to my car? 

I got myself to slow down enough to try to re-read the instructions and I had been turning they key the wrong way! (There is a lock and an unlock direction and I had been turning it to lock!)

So I gave it a turn in the OTHER direction and the door opened and I got myself to work with plenty of time left over (since I leave kind of stupid early to be honest but that's a post for another time) and then I swapped out the new dead battery with the new not dead battery and then I ACTUALLY CHECKED to make sure it worked and then we all lived happily ever after and on my way home I bought another new battery to keep on hand and I hope it doesn't drain itself by the time I have to change it out but I also hope that next time I do change out the battery I remember to test it before I try to use it!

Oh Dear

I have a cookie recipe (from Jamie Oliver) that is written in grams (because of Jamie Oliver!) so it asks for, for example, 250 grams of whatever instead of a cup amount.

I have made these cookies a good amount of times since I found the recipe and I was about to make them this weekend when my kitchen scale ran out of batteries.

Batteries that I *knew* I was out of but didn't see a rush to get more so.... I didn't.

I did find a small flashlight that uses the same kind of batteries (triple As) but ironically they were low power too (or so the scale said) (and yes I know this might mean the scale itself is dying but I do think it's just two sets of low/old AAAs) so I was S.O.L on measuring by grams.  Bugger.

I had managed to get the butter measured before the scale gave out but I still needed to measure the sugar and flour (the chocolate chips we just do by heart... as in I always over measure so just use the half of the bag that is left from the last time I made the cookies!)

I texted my neighbour to see if she was home but she wasn't and turns out she has neither a kitchen scale nor any triple A batteries anyway so I was packing things away when my brain reminded me that I could convert the gram amount to cup amount and it would probably be fine!  ("Probably" being the operative word here!)

So I used the old google and unfortunately got kind of unclear responses (some sites gave me different measurement amounts for sugar than for flour etc) so I made up the batter as best I could, knowing it wouldn't likely be perfect and I did give it a quick taste test and it was a bit on the sweet side but I figured I could live with that?

Off they went into the oven and at the proper time I checked on them and... um... well the measurements were NOT accurate y'all!

Instead of the cookies I am used to I opened the oven to discover super spread out and thin discs.   D'oh.

I kept them in the oven a bit longer (almost burning one batch... ahem) and I'll be putting them in the freezer (as I always do with cookies) and I'm hoping they're edible if a bit weird and I'll be going to pick up some batteries in the next couple of days!

So yeah, I made "chocolate chip discs" of some kind, oops!

Well Crap!

First of all, it's December, yes quite SUDDENLY, even if we (ok maybe just me?) are not quite ready for it and all that it can bring/entail!  So, um happy December and end of this weirdly quick year....

Second of all, even though I've been using this blog platform since the start of this blog, so like a hundred plus years give or take, I just discovered something this weekend and I feel not so smart?

So when I get a comment here, I get a notification on my phone in an email app and I try to remember to go and reply to the comment.  I like the idea of actually engaging with folks who have made the effort to say something so I have always replied to comments!

From time to time I'll get a spam comment.  The system often "catches" them but sometimes doesn't and when it doesn't I have to go in and manually delete and mark the comment as spam.  

So this weekend I got a spam comment and went to find it and couldn't.

Well that was weird because I'd gotten the notification of the comment (which is how I could tell it was spam.... many of them have a similar pattern) so I started to click around trying to find it as I don't like spam comments sitting around being visible. (NO attention for YOU!)

So I'm looking for this comment and I find this spot I don't think I'd ever noticed before where Blogger puts spam comments.  But I swear, not all of them?  So I click on this section and BAM.  Hundreds of comments.  HUNDREDS.  Dating back to the first year of this blog.  And you guys?  Most of them frigging MINE!!!!

I started to go through them, without actually knowing if they were published or hidden or what and, well after dealing with the first handful I just mass deleted all of them.  D'oh.

So if you've ever had a comment not show up (not that you necessarily check?  I don't know how it works) or you've left a comment and I seemingly ignored it?  Well, I guess they got chomped up by the spam bot and I had no idea.

And I may have just deleted hundreds of my *own* comments dating back a decade or more but it just kind of is what it is at this point and kind of hilariously ironic that the comments of the person who "owns" and writes the blog had been marked as spam.  Le sigh.

So yeah, sorry for not knowing the system and for any comment weirdness you may have encountered!  User error on my end! Whoops.

I'm Not Complaining, I'm Just Mulling

Our postal workers are on strike right now (I mean I doubt it'll be resolved by the time this posts but you never know) and I am mulling over what to do about sending Christmas cards.

Right now we have no idea when the strike will be over but the hopes are that it will be on the sooner side (with good results for the workers of course) but with the awareness that it may not be AND that there will be delays when service restarts.

So, I am sort of currently planning to put my cards into mailboxes even though I know they're just going to sit there? rather than not putting them into boxes until the strike is over?  I dunno.  

I already had the return debacle and so am not going to try to send cards in any other way and I have another package to return that I'm just waiting out (they gave an extended return window thankfully) but like, I feel like I *assume* mailboxes are safe places to leave cards in and to be honest I kind of just want "cards" off my plate but I dunno.

I've check the "usual" dates for "mail by" and my International (mainly UK) cards need to be mailed the earliest and so they're for sure going to be "late" and any cards coming from there (I usually get a few from relatives) will also be later than usual so it kind of just is what it is?

I already have the cards and the stamps and I guess I'll decide in a week or so what I'm going to do with them if the strike is still on.

I like getting mail and in the last few weeks I've realized what a habit checking my mailbox (we have a mail box area in our building rather than a mail slot in our doors like you might in a home) is as it's been weird coming home and NOT going to the box to check for mail. 

I do hope things resolve and I know it's really hard on small businesses and other things but I hope that the workers get what they deserve... times are tough all round and strikes aren't fun for anyone. 

Woof!

I have always loved (and wanted) dogs.

And I purposely fill my social media feeds with animal content, including dog trainer things, so I try to learn about dog "language" and stuff.  (And cats too but not the current point... little fluffy butted weirdos.)

I was sitting in the waiting area of a flu/covid shot place (pharmacy) and a lady sat next to me with her dog.

I have to try to resist my urge to like SMUSH THE DOG WITH ALL THE LOVE because it's not my animal and I don't know it's temperament and I have learned that the signals dogs give out are often misinterpreted (I'm sure I've done that a bunch of times unknowingly) so I was letting the dog sniff me if it wanted and then move off and I was chatting with the lady about how old the dog was and its name and all that stuff and the lady was awesome and gave me a treat to give the dog and the dog sat and tried to give me its paw and I said how cute it is when dogs just try whatever they think you want for the treat and then the lady asked me about my dog.

I explained that I don't have one as I'm not allowed where I currently live and she was quite surprised and said "well you're certainly a dog person" and this is like the nicest thing I've had said about me in a while.

I wouldn't say I am a dog person quite yet as I've never lived with one or had one of my own but I do love them and try to learn about them so I guess that's a start.

But yeah, I am working to be more respectful of dogs I don't know in order to not accidentally stress them out but man oh man do I ever want them to love me and come pay attention to me! 

The Relativity Of It All

I turn fifty in a few months.  And I was thinking about it the other day and I realized that when I think about my legit age (vs my "I feel this old" age which is a few decades ago) I mentally think 45.

Which, I realize, those four missing years coincide with the whole pandemic and lockdown and time getting weird in 2020 and 2021 and like yeah those/these last 4 or 5 years haven't been solidly marked.  It's quite odd.

I know MANY of us have talked about this time weirdness especially during the lockdown times and then when things started to try to reopen so I know I'm not alone in this weird feeling of time having not run the same way for the last *while* but yeah, I genuinely have a hard time knowing my actual age and I think it's partly what has gone on both globally and personally this last 4/5 years.

I'm sure time being weird is also something to do with getting older in general but still... I'm really not sure how I got from 44 to 49 without quite noticing.  Ooops?