Thursday, 20 September 2007

Dragonfly *

I was in my local video store the other week renting a couple of movies. (Um, ok, that was an awesome sentence, because, what else would I have been doing at a video store? Buying cheese?)

I was up at the counter, waiting while the gal typed in the secret codes (or whatever it is they type in, and can I point out the awesomeness of this sentence too, starting almost identically to the first one? I am on a roll) when I got a tap on the shoulder. I turned towards the tapper, expecting to find out I'd dropped something, and found myself facing a smiling older woman.

Who just looked at me.

So I looked back, waiting.

"Hi" she said. "How are you?"

"Um, good." I replied, always polite, waiting

"What are you up to?" she asked, and it dawned on me that the look on her face wasn't that of someone making idle conversation, but was the look of someone who expected me to know who she was.

And, while this should probably have been the moment I inclined my head and said "I'm sorry, I don't remember how I know you." I just couldn't do it. See, I get falsely recognized quite a lot. People often tell me I look like their cousin, their neighbour, that girl they used to work with, but usually after they take a closer look they realize I'm not who they thought and they laugh and tell me who they had mistaken me for. And she seemed SO sure we knew each other.

I didn't know what to do. It was way past the point of her realizing she was mistaken and past the point of me asking her to remind me how we knew each other because, dude, I really had no idea who this woman was or why I might know her. So I kept on going. Because I'm a chicken like that. Being shy doesn't help in these socially awkward situations, you know.

"Um, I'm just doing spy work, you know" I mumbled, assuming she'd realize she didn't know any spies. But she nodded and went on, "And what else? What's going on with you?"

"Uh, just, you know, renting some romantic comedies because I can" I said, realizing I couldn't say anything more without making her wonder what had happened to the possible husband and kids she might think I have. My brain was going a mile a minute so I did the obvious and turned the tables; "And you?" I asked, thinking more information might trigger my memory if I did, actually, know her from somewhere.

"Oh, I'm watching these because you know Al won't!" she joked, because, well obviously, I know Al! That crazy Al.

So I flustered around, made as quick an escape as I could, all the while really trying to figure out if I had any idea how I might possibly know this woman. Because I didn't. I so had no idea who she was. I still don't.

I grabbed my videos and took off home, calling several people to ask if they knew an older woman with a husband called Al. I still have no idea who she is. Was.

As I cracked open my videos, I realized in my haste to get out of the awkwardness, I'd taken hers by mistake.

So, Al's wife who wanted to watch Dreamgirls? Sorry, I'm not who you thought I was. I'm sorry. I wish I'd said something.

And I'm not just saying that because I'm a spy.


*Hi, I'm the title and I have nothing to do with the post. Just in case you were confused. Which, Victoria promises me you weren't. She says you are smart. So ok.


Blogger McGone said...

Obviously "Dragonfly" is your Super Secret Agent Spy Name.

You should have asked her is Al was still screwing around behind her back. Or if he "ever got a doctor to look at that one weird rash." That would have been fun.

Thursday, September 20, 2007 11:30:00 am  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

That's kind of creepy. I wonder if she was hitting on you. :)

Thursday, September 20, 2007 1:43:00 pm  
Blogger Delton said...

Poor Aunt Mabel*! First you don't recognize her in her spy costume. Then you're rude and short with her. Finally you take her movies too! She probably went home and was forced to talk to that Al about how you turned out!

*Insert the name of some distant relative here.

Thursday, September 20, 2007 8:18:00 pm  
Blogger Yvonne said...

*giggles at all the comments*

Thursday, September 20, 2007 8:30:00 pm  
Blogger Princess of the Universe said...

It's a pretty dragonfly.
I probably would have the done the exact same thing you did. :)

Thursday, September 20, 2007 8:35:00 pm  
Blogger Victoria said...

McGone, I can't believe you sussed that out! Curses. Now I'll have to mind wipe you. (stare at this dot for me, would ya?) .

A Martini, I never even thought of that! Ruh roh! She was a good thirty years older than me so I sure hope not. I mean, not that there's anything wrong with that!
; )

Delton, or maybe this was a whole secret spy interchange and I just can't tell you about it but I've now released the secret code? heh.

Yvonne : )

Princess, thanks, and I'm glad you would have done the same! :D

Thursday, September 20, 2007 9:25:00 pm  
Anonymous MollyB said...

Victoria, you missed out on a real cougar! (Smirk)

When I first moved to a really staid town in Germany, I greeted older people on the street the way North Americans tend to do. Just a polite good morning or whatever as you walk by.

This was culturally SO far from what they were expecting, that more than a few started talking to me as if they knew me, and despite my strong accent, kept trying to place me somewhere.

Seriously, I wasn't trying to mess with them or anything, but these people would start telling me their health problems and ask how I was doing in really tentative ways, as if I was one more glitch in their ever-weakening memory, and if I would just remind them that I was their illegitimate great-granddaughter from the soldier who'd dated their granddaughter back when the Americans were in town ...

Friday, September 21, 2007 8:25:00 am  
Anonymous slinger said...

*just noticed the little comment below "Leave your comment" Cool

Anyway, maybe Al was short for Alice?

I do like the whole theory that maybe you and this older woman were actually exchanging spy material by playing dumb. Maybe Al is the code name for your assignment, and when she said "Al won't watch them.." that phrase triggered your orders to set up a phone tap on his line.

*yeah, I just had an Aliasish flashback geek moment.

Friday, September 21, 2007 11:08:00 am  
Blogger Victoria said...

lol Molly : )

Slinger, maybe you're right about the phone tap n stuff! ; )


Friday, September 21, 2007 6:36:00 pm  

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