Friday 12 February 2010

And I'm Not Talking About Cucumber Sandwiches

OK, this is awkward but true; I've never used a cucumber for anything other than food.

In fact, I don't even really like cucumbers. They make me burp, to be quite honest.

But I was picking up ingredients for a new recipe yesterday and it called for two medium sized cucumbers and for the life of me I just couldn't buy them.

All I could think was that every one in the produce section was giggling behind their backs at the single girl buying cucumbers for "you know what" reasons. Not that anyone was even noticing.

Do people really .... you know, do that? Or is it just urban legend?

Am I unable to buy cucumbers due to an urban legend/myth?

And, yes, I'm almost as awkward buying condoms.

(Not that I need to buy any, Mom. They're for a friend. I'm still saving myself for marriage.)

16 comments:

Dominic said...

When you think that people are giving you funny looks because of what you're buying, it's well worth picking up a home pregnancy test and one wire coathanger, just to see how they react to that particular combination ;)

http://xkcd.com/236/

Esperanza said...

i've never done anything w/ a cucumber EVEN eat one. I think its a myth....

maybe

cocoa_no_gogo said...

Try buying cucumbers and condoms together and see what happens.

Plus, why would a toaster be named Marjory?

I hope you are doing well.

Cocoa

the one in the back said...

Well, if they're thinking that when you buy cukes, they're probably the dirty ones. People will think what they want. And besides, how would they know you're single? Unless of course you actually broadcast it to the community when you food shop: "Attention, single girle buying a pair of medium-sized cucumbers. Insert sexual inuendo here."

If it makes you feel better, buy the produce w other produce to give them the appropriate context. Or do what cocoa said in the last comment. Then you can really give them something to talk about ;-).
Happy shopping.

Unknown said...

No such awkward feelings with Bananas?

Victoria said...

Dominic, that'd be so bad! But, your comic is bang on :)

Well, myth or not, Esperanza, on the eating front, I don't think you're missing much ;)

Cocoa, I'd have to be drunk to pull that off. And, I don't know... why would a toaster be named Marjory? Because that's what her parents named her I'd guess? Hope you're doing well too my friend.


ToitB, Oh, that would be SO bad if the broadcast it! YIKES! I just figure everyone knows I'm single because I lack a wedding ring. (I know, I'm a little crazy in the head like that.) Maybe what I'd have to do is buy it while holding the recipe book in front of me saying "hmmm, cucumbers are needed for this RECIPE here". Yeah, that'd work! ;)



Noooooooo, Brad, and I hope you're not suggesting I should? Argh! I may never buy produce again! *hides in the corner rocking*

Ms Behaviour said...

Just stop caring what strangers think. That'll fix everything! For example, my new hair cut has met with a lot of rather extreme reactions but, since I don't care what anyone but myself thinks, I just say thanks (regardless of the reaction) and promptly forget about it.

Victoria said...

Oooh, do you love your new haircut? It is awesome?

Ms Behaviour said...

Honestly, it's a bit shorter than I'm used to so I'm still figuring it out. I'm okay with this though because I don't have a hairdresser in Vancouver so I need time for it to grow out without looking ridiculous. Know any good hair dressers in Vancouver?

Victoria said...

Not anymore, I can ask around though :)

Jenn said...

If you want to get some good "looks," I always enjoyed a trip to the liquor store around 9 months pregnant. I'm going to miss that!

Victoria said...

I should tell my girlfriend to go try that one out! lol

Yvonne said...

LOLLOL
OMG, that never even occurred to me. Considering how mainstream sex toys have become, I don't think you need to worry about that particular issue!
(I've even been to craft fairs that had sex toy booths! lol)

Victoria said...

Giggle

American Homemaker said...

I only eat cucumbers LOL But as a single girl myself I've actually wondered what the cashier was thinking when I'm buying them too haha

Victoria said...

lol