Thursday, 3 November 2011

Missing What Almost Was

You Just Keep Me Hanging On by foundimagination
Just because both Chad and the Universe decided that he wasn't to be my boyfriend doesn't mean I don't wish I had a Chad-like boyfriend in my life.

I try to remember not to idealize Chad because he certainly had his faults and I'm sure had I gotten to know him more, I would have found others, but there were things about him and us together that I really really liked.

I liked how easy he was to be around.

I liked how much we laughed together.

I liked that he was good looking.

And outside of those aspects of him, I liked having someone I knew was thinking about me, and I liked that he let me know he was thinking about me.

I liked getting giggly when I'd get a text from him and I liked feeling nervous and fluttery before seeing him.

I haven't forgotten the frustration, confusion and worry I went through when things went off, I'm just saying that it's difficult to forget the fun, good, nice parts of the start of a relationship, especially since it's the first one in a while.

Guess I'm wishing for something similar again. Something fun, uplifting, easy, giggle-and-flutter-inducing and good.

I think I'd like that.

8 comments:

Yamuna said...

Sigh. Me too.
Maybe the Universe forgot about us?

Mizkay said...

Ugh, it's tough. You want to remember the good because the good made you feel great, but thinking about all that makes it such a bummer to then remember that the good is no longer there. And you certainly don't want to think about the bad because who wants to do that??

Haco said...

Oh how I wish for something fun and giggle-and-flutter-inducing too! It should be this hard to find! I think when you have that and then it disappears its really horrible :-(

Haco said...

*I meant to say shouldn't be this hard to find :-)

Jonathan said...

There's a whole raft of sayings about things that kind of go "you can't really know X until you have experienced Y"...

I wonder if they extend to being with somebody? Maybe we don't appreciate being with somebody until we have been, and then are not ?

Don't listen to me though - I'm just full of stupid ideas tonight.

Victoria said...

Oh, Yamuna, I think the Universe is just saving something great for us ;)

Totally Mizkay, totally

I know what you mean, Haco

All ideas are welcome, Jonathan, even those you think aren't smart ;)

Lesley said...

I'm wishing for that too!

Victoria said...

:)