Saturday, 24 November 2012

I Know

I know, this story should be over right?

Should be.

I emailed him the next day, a simple, neutral email.  "Hey, just checking in like you asked.  Have a good weekend."

He got back to me, asked for my number, said he had some things he wanted to talk about.

I gave him my cell number and he sent me a text.

I didn't know what to expect, but it was work related.  (He knows I'm a spy, obviously, had some questions for me, no big deal.)

Sometime after dinner Saturday night, he texted again.

"Would it be ok if I stopped by quickly on my way out?"

"Um... vaguely?"

See, I'd already thought my way through everything.  I won't sleep with a married man.  I won't be "the other woman" but this was the first time I've understood just how easy it could be to become that person.

I don't know his wife.  I've never met her, I don't know her name, what she looks like, she's a non person to me.  And if I wanted to, I could just keep on with that thought, never ask about her, never want to know.

Because it wouldn't be that I wanted to date him or marry him, just that I wanted to see what it was like to sleep with him again.  It would be that I was so caught up in the memories of what was and the idea of what might be that I would sleep with him, and no one would ever have to know.

Except I'm not that person.  Maybe there's a part of me that is, and even a part of me that wants to be, but I'm not.  So when he asked if he could stop by quickly, I knew that if he even hinted at anything, I'd be telling him I needed to see signed divorce papers first.

So I said, sure. 

Because, I was curious too.  And suspicious.  I don't think it's ok for married men to be dropping by their exes houses.  Especially not when said ex has just told them they were great in bed.

But maybe I was just assuming too much.  Maybe he just wanted to drop off my stuff.



Anonymous Anonymous said...

So if he kisses you, will you kiss him back?

However tempting it is to get involved again, DON'T!! Not worth the hassle and heartbreak.

Saturday, November 24, 2012 9:17:00 am  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Oh and don't let him come up to your place - go down to the door. Put him on the spot a little.

Saturday, November 24, 2012 9:19:00 am  
Blogger Victoria said...

Well, for better or for worse, all this has already happened...
But, yeah, I hear ya.

Saturday, November 24, 2012 2:09:00 pm  

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