Thursday, 2 January 2014


Sleigh Ride! by foundimagination
I've talked before (I think) about how I always feel guilty with the online dating site because there's judgement involved.

Usually, an initial judgement based on the photos the person has attached to their profile.

There's the initial "are they unattractive (to me)?" judgement, but then there are others I go through.

Guys holding a beer or other drink just makes me think they drink more than I'm comfortable with.  I don't really want to be with a guy who's a big boozer, and if you've got a picture of you with a drink, I'm thinking it's a fairly big thing for you to enjoy your drinking.

Guys showing off their body in some way (shirtless, tight shirt, etc.) just makes me think that they are overly concerned with how they look and that they're more shallow than I'd like a boyfriend/friend to be.

Guys who have a picture of them with a child or a pretty woman just make me uncomfortable because all I can think is "does she know her picture is here, or do that kid's parents know their child is in your profile?"  I'm guessing it's supposed to make me think the guy's good with kids or that he's popular with attractive women but it just makes me not interested.  (The pretty girl thing more so than the kid thing.)

I feel bad, but these are the thoughts I have when I'm looking at someone's profile pictures.  And it's the weirdest thing to be deciding to "talk" to someone or not based on whatever pictures they decided to put up.

But I guess it is what it is and there are probably pictures that women put up that say certain things about them too.


Anonymous Bad.Days said...

I do the exact same "filtering" process with online dating profiles. The other ones that annoy me are guys with pictures of themselves holding guns, or the pictures of their cars (and if they love their car that much, there probably isn't room for me, lol).

But, it is tough knowing that my pictures are probably being judged the same way.

Thursday, January 02, 2014 8:19:00 am  
Blogger Jason Langlois said...

I'm not sure it's weird. Don't we make decisions about whether or not to approach someone in person the same way? And given that a dating profile is the kind of place where you have time to actual craft your "online persona", then the choice of profile pic really is going to tell you a lot about the person and the impression they want to give.

Thursday, January 02, 2014 9:08:00 am  
Blogger Jonathan said...

You're not weird at all. I would have thought all the same things.

Thursday, January 02, 2014 1:13:00 pm  
Blogger Victoria said...

I haven't seen (yet?) any guys with guns Bad.Days, but that would certainly be a turn off for me!

That's a really good point Jason, thanks, I feel much less crazy/bad now :)

Thanks Jonathan ;)

Thursday, January 02, 2014 3:25:00 pm  

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