One of the great (and many) difficulties with anxiety (at this level) is that I am so overwhelmed and mentally, emotionally and physically crowded with conflicting but very real sounding and feeling thoughts, opinions, ideas, stories, predictions and rational that I often can not see a way forward. At all. So my life can get to be a pile of lose-lose situations. And outside opinions just further confuse things.
It is really very difficult and no fun at all and I would not wish this on anyone. At all.