Monday, 10 July 2017

Go Easy

I am incredibly heavy hearted today.  There was a death on Saturday and it has hit me unexpectedly hard.

It was a fellow I met last year at Burning Man.  We had chatted on and off for a year or so and he was very supportive of my art.  Most often, liking the ones I wasn't fond of. 

There was one in particular that he really really liked, so I took it to him at the burn last year.  Didn't manage to find him the first time I went to his camp so I left the art on his motorized barca-lounger. 

I went back later to make sure he'd found it and got to meet him and his lady.

They were good, solid, salt of the earth people and warm and friendly and I looked forward to seeing them again the next time I made it back to Burning Man.

We talked from time to time online.  He shared some of his struggles with me, and always let me know how my art impacted him.

I found out Saturday morning that he'd gone into hospital a couple of weeks ago... been released and gone back in.  I left him a message of hopeful recovery and found out a few hours later that he had died that morning.

I have no words.  I'm broken by this.

Perhaps thinking of him spending his last two weeks in fear (he was scared, they didn't seem to know what was wrong with him, and he was very very unwell... seemingly suddenly.)  Or seeing the outpouring of shock and love from those who knew him. 

The shock of him being gone when he was one of those people you just sort of expect to always be there.  And then thinking of the time I didn't spend with him because there was "always next year" to catch up.

He was always kind towards me..... in his admiration of my art and his willingness to help me with Burning Man stuff.  He had no reason to be kind to me.  He just was.  The world needs more people like him.

This world is a strange one.  Social media allows us to make connections we otherwise would likely have not.  You become part of someone's life without being directly IN it. 

I don't have much else to say, my eyes are swollen from crying and my soul hurts.

Tell people.  Tell people the positive they are in your life.  Don't wait until they're gone and you're typing it out... they're not here to see that.  Tell that girl at the grocery store you always appreciate her warm smile.  Tell your dental hygienist he always makes your teeth feel great.  Wave to the flagger that snuck you through the line and stopped the traffic after you.  Give a gift card to the guys at the mechanics office who always take good care of your car.  TELL PEOPLE.

Because one day you wake up and they're gone.

Be well my friend.  I'm sorry our time knowing each other was so short.  Burn bright, and I'll see you on the flip side.


Blogger Jason Langlois said...

I'm sorry. Words always seem inadequate, but through your words and your sadness, it's clear the world is a lesser place without your friend.

Tuesday, July 11, 2017 7:25:00 am  
Anonymous Elliott said...

I'm sorry for your loss. You obviously cared about your friend. It sucks when the world loses a kind soul...there aren't enough of them in this world.

You make very good points about appreciating people every day. I don't do enough of this as I charge through my days.

Thank you for writing and reminding of things and for presenting ideas/thoughts based on your love of arts and all things beautiful. It is such a different approach than my cold world of facts, figures, taxes, and finance. I need to remember as I go through life that other perspectives/thoughts/ideas are needed to keep the world a happy and healthy place.

I hope your memories of your friend help to heal your loss.

Tuesday, July 11, 2017 8:25:00 am  
Blogger Victoria said...

Thank you Jason. He was a good one.

Thank you Elliott! And yes, balance... balance is important. :)

Love you both!

Wednesday, July 12, 2017 9:44:00 am  

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