Wednesday 6 May 2020

I'm Tired

Y'all I'm tired.

Jason had a medical event last week.  It wasn't virus related, but he did need to go to the hospital and he did not want to.  Long story short, I was freaked out (he called to say what was going on) and told him I was on my way to drive him there and then when I got to his place I passed the ambulance with him in the back of it, so, I thankfully didn't have to take him.... is that selfish?  Perhaps, but I'm scared.  I just am.

So he's fine.  Which is great.  And he said the protocols were great and that the suspected Covid patients actually apparently go to another hospital so his risk was lower (but that he still didn't touch anything and wore a mask and washed everything and showered once home).  (But he's putting himself in isolation anyway just in case.)  But me?  I'm exhausted.

I did NOT sleep the night this happened.  Not in that over dramatic way where you sleep a little but say you didn't.... I actually did not sleep.  I lay in bed, sure, but sleep?  No.  And my body hasn't recovered from that yet.  So I'm tired.

And I think I was tired anyway... this is tiring, but now I'm tired on top of that tired.

And when I got up the morning after my non sleep night I was worried at how tired I was.  Because tired can mean run down and run down can mean more prone to getting sick and I do not, have I mentioned?  I do not want to get sick right now.  More so than usual.  And, well, I never want to get sick so.. yeah.

Tired.

But yeah, Jason's fine now.  He feels dumb, and I won't comment on that... ahem, but he's dealing with things and all that stuff and me?  I am still recovering from the fear and stress and I am pretty damn tired.  And yeah, it was awful at the time, and I wish life were not this way... but it is... and apparently that's just that.

Sigh.

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