Thursday, 7 May 2020

That Albert Guy Was Right

So time is no longer a thing, eh?

Well, I mean it is, insofar as how we... track it or whatever but my brain, or my ... psyche?  or whatever it is is no longer dealing with time in the same way.

Like it's squishing and extending and March was so so so so long and drawn out and never ending and then April took about a day to happen and I really have no idea how it's May and yes, I've often talked here and there about how fast a year went or "man, how is it this month already" but right now I feel like I'm really losing track of things and that the time keeping part of my reality is slipping.

I'm not sure weekends mean much to me right now... they're just another day when I have to do whatever it is and not do whatever.  And every day has the same sense of "stay well stay safe stay well stay safe" and I'm pretty much just inside all the time.... I mean, I have no appointments.  I don't GO anywhere on a regular basis like I used to.  I'm not complaining about that, I'm doing fine without whatever appointments, I just mean that I had no idea how much structure they added to my world.  "Ok, it's Tuesday, that means I have physio at 4." Whereas now, I have a sense of the name of the day because my computer and phone say the day..... but there isn't the same structure.

I do have my video counselling appointments and I do have my grocery delivery but those are two things over seven days.  Yes I have things I'm doing and keeping up with and my phone and computer diary/calendars make sure I know when things are due but things aren't defined.  I lost track of the fact that (Name of show) comes out on (day of week) because what are days even?  (Plus I don't have cable so don't need to catch them on the exact day but still)

It's weird.  I know time is still the same, it's my perception of it that is different and time really really is relative.  (And it's even weirder that so many of us, all around the frigging world, noticed the same thing....)

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