Monday 21 September 2020

OK.....

 With hopes that me typing this doesn't jinx anything.... the fire-smoke situation cleared up this weekend.

And everyone is SO so thankful for that.  Everyone. 

I woke up Sunday morning to limited vision skies again but it turns out that was just fog fog rather than smoke-fog-cloud, so windows stayed open and outside was visited.  Amen.

As I sit here attempting to add the photo you're (hopefully) looking at I'm still dealing with the frustration around new user interface layouts (or some proper term like that).  Blogger isn't the only organization that's changing things up but they so far seem to be the only one that's working to improve reported issues and listening to feedback, at least as far as I can see.  I've started to feel something like guilty/uncomfortable for the things I use that are free.  You know, the whole "if it's free, you're the product" thing.  Like, blogger, and social media sites, and google and yes, I've started to watch that Netflix documentary that  folks are talking about but I also don't want to pay a lot and I really dislike subscription sites.  Like I bought a program to help me balance finances and that kind of thing - personal finance software.  And it was a bit of an expenditure but they update regularly and I feel a bit more comfortable about using it.  I dunno, I'm babbling.

This has been a rough month.  A high anxiety, low calm month.  I said to Jason the other day (after who knows what crappy thing took place) that I felt like I've been running on high alert anxiety adrenaline since March (pandemic) and this last month I've been on some white knuckle using up fumes and hanging by a thread kind of thing and that it wasn't sustainable.

And because I can't control the things that are happening to/for/around me, I'm trying to find ways, HEALTHY ways to cope and approach the uncertainty and anxiety differently.  So there's the work of handling the anxiety and upset and then there's the work of reframing my thoughts and trying to push through to calm or positive or something.  It's been feeling like a lot.

But I really am glad to have the fresh air back, really really.  It was making things even worse.  So here's to fresh air and clean skies. 



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