Saturday, 5 October 2019

A Gentleman's Agreement

I do not like bugs.

But, I pretty much tolerate them.  I know they have their purpose... bugs, insects, beetles, what have you, I just, well, not my thing.  Ick. 

I'm not really a bug killer, I try to let them be... I escort spiders out of my living space, direct flies out of the window, that sort of thing.

Mosquitoes?  Nope.  They get killed.  Ants?  Nope, sorry, can't have you making a scent trail to my space.  But most everyone else?  You're ok, just... leave me be please.  Ew.

Except... silverfish.


I'm sure I've talked about them before but silverfish I do not like.  I know most buildings, especially older ones, have them, and I know they're relatively harmless... (pretty much) but no, I do not like them, I do not, and if I see them, I squish them bye bye.  Sorry, not sorry.

So the silverfish in my apartment and I have a gentleman's agreement.  If I see you?  I will get you.  If you stay out of my way?  Well... shrug. 

Now, I know this breeds nasty ones that run around in the dark or whatever Darwin would say but I just, can't just let them scuttle about freely when I see one! 

And... I thought we had this understanding.  But this morning, one of them broke that agreement... and now I have to burn everything down.

I had a neatly folded pile of cozy clothes next to my bed, on my dresser waiting for me to slip into this morning.  And when I picked up the track pants THERE WAS A SILVERFISH HIDING UNDER THEM!  NO NO NO NO NO NO NO!  THAT IS NOT THE AGREEMENT!  The agreement was you can be in bathtubs or on the floor or maybe, MAYBE in an occasional drawer, but under the pants I'm about to put on?  NO!  NOT ALLOWED!  EMERGENCY SIRENS!!!!

So I guess I have to burn down my apartment now, which is going to suck seeing as it's raining and I won't have any pants to wear.

This is why bugs should just... you know, stay out of my way.  Gah.

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