Wednesday, 17 November 2021

I'm What?

Remember a while ago (ok, like maybe a week... sigh, just feels like forever) I lost my VISA?

Well, I've just remembered something that happened on that day.

When I was in the store and realized I'd lost (or at the time I still had hope it might have just been forgotten at home) my VISA, I went around the store putting everything back.  Down one aisle, there was a gal standing in front of where I needed to put something, so I waited, at a distance cuz Covid (STILL) for her to finish and move.  She did whatever she was doing, looked up at me and exclaimed "YOU'RE SCARY!"

At the time, I just ignored her but then I started wondering.  What, actually, about me was scary?  I checked the mask I was wearing, it wasn't anything interpretable (it was a "tree of life scene actually") but maybe it looked like a mouth somehow?  Maybe my upset came through my eyes (all you can see when I'm wearing a mask) as angry?  Maybe I was taller than usual, or she was short?  (I wasn't really paying attention)  Maybe she just assumed I was glaring at her?  Or maybe she wasn't the most well in the mind herself?

I still can't figure out what aspect of me might appear scary to someone... I'm not terribly physically imposing.  In fact, I don't think I'm physically imposing at all, ever?  I might not have had a happy face, but half of that was covered by a mask so if I was frowning you couldn't see and I know I wasn't.  Was my body language weird?  Well I was carrying a basket over one arm and holding popcorn kernels in one hand so.. probably not?  Was I too close to her?  Maybe????  But I'm usually pretty mindful of strangers (fucking Covid) and space.

I dunno man... it just felt weird and my gut feeling at the time was that she wasn't quite "right" in the head and clearly whatever was going on had little to do with me but what a strange thing to hear.  Must suck for people who have a bigger physical presence to hear that when they're not actively trying to be intimidating. 

No comments: