The Feed Fed Me

Social media algorithms have a tendency to show you more of the things you look at and so over the last little while I've been "seeing" more videos about keeping up your mobility as you age.  (Most of these folks showing the moves and stretches and exercises are older.)

At some point, these videos made me start worrying that I couldn't do things anymore.  Namely, run.

I might have been a fast runner when I was a kid and as an adult I did running groups and races for a while but I never came to enjoy it and I eventually stopped.  I was never particularly quick or anything, but for me it was about the fitness rather than the speed.

But in my head I just always think that I can run, I just don't.

But then I started to (over) think about it and I thought... hmmm, I really haven't been doing much and my body isn't getting stronger or healthier on its own.  What if I CAN'T run anymore?

Like can't pick up my legs enough to do it?  

And I'm not talking about "go run a marathon" more like "uh oh Zombies, can I outrun them?"  And right now it feels like my answer is no, and I'm actually more concerned about the physical mechanics of it than the cardio (I know my cardio isn't ideal currently.)

So I started to think about maybe trying to run like on purpose, like on a treadmill or something and I still might but I'm happy to say that I "jogged" across streets to get out of the path of a turning car just to sort of see if I could and, yes, I can still do the physical motions of running.

This "issue" in my head may also have come from witnessing my Mom turn to jog towards me and trip over her runners/the sidewalk... a really hard image to have in my head and one that I think my brain/body got kind of stuck on and tried to apply to myself.  But I am also aware that with bodies, it's easy to lose what we were able to do, and it happens faster than you think.

I know I lost a LOT of fitness and strength and mobiilty over this last decade with my mental health and then lockdowns and the pandemic and all of those things combined.

I am starting to get some strength and mobility back and I'm trying to work on it all the time (knowing I forget some days) and I may still try some jogging, even though I dislike it, in part to show myself I can but also for a bit more cardio and some weight bearing too.  

But I suppose this is also a reminder that with life and especially with social media and other systems that have algorithms that what you see will bring you more of what you're seeing and then you'll see more of that and so don't watch or interact with the things that upset you or stress you or make you like life less.