Saturday, 9 August 2008

I'm Scratching My Head Over Here

This is the question that's swimming around my head these days and one that I've asked some of my closer friends to answer:

Why would a single guy not sleep with an attractive, single girl when given the chance?

And I've had the gamut of answers thrown at me from "he doesn't want to ruin the friendship" (yeah right) to "he has a very small pee pee" (hmmmm, possible.)

So, to the gentlemen out there, seriously... why do *you* think Bird hasn't yet taken me up on my offer? And more interestingly? Why is he not talking to me about it one way or the other?

I can make up reasons until the cows come home, but to be quite honest, I'm baffled.

Because this? Is not a situation I've ever found myself in before.


And the longer we go without a) some sort of conversation about it or b) some sort of nakedness, the more curious I find myself getting. And the more bizarre the stories I make up about him become.

So help me out here. What am I missing? None of my friends can figure it out, but maybe y'all can.


Anonymous Dominic said...

Depends on the man, really.

I have a number of attractive female friends I just wouldn't sleep with. It would feel so wrong to have sex with someone who's firmly in the "friend" space of my mind. (You know how the male brain is highly compartmentalised, I take it? :)

Maybe it's the same with Bird.

Another possibility: Maybe he isn't sure if you're serious and doesn't want to take chances? Don't forget just how bad we are at working out what women are thinking :)

Saturday, August 09, 2008 7:50:00 am  
Blogger Victoria said...

Hmmmm..... fair points. :)

Saturday, August 09, 2008 11:06:00 am  
Blogger David Maxam said...

Reasons I wont sleep with a good looking single girl.

A. I can tell she's projecting more meaning onto than I am. Therefore there will be big drama consequences. I know that I can't 'just sleep with her' without the expectations of becoming her boyfriend, and her wanting to show me off around town, etc etc. I know it's not going to work out, and therefore I'll inevitably hurt her, and then have to put up with being called a jerk and all that nasty stuff that will eventually come from this.

B. I'm actually interested in a friend or acquaintances of hers. It's not that I don't want her, but sleeping with her makes me thing I wont have a chance with her friend. (Many guys report the reverse is closer to the truth, but those of us guys raised on Disney movies and romantic comedies are conditioned to think if we sleep with you, your hot friend would never sleep with us... True or No?)

C. I still have 'Oneitis' for another girl, usually the last hot girl to break up with me. This affliction makes it impossible to enjoy sleeping with a perfectly good and available girl, because she's not 'the one' that I'm still hung up on. I'll be in the sack with you, but thinking of her... this makes me feel like I'm cheating on her, even though she's not interested. 'Oneitis' is a horrible affliction like that. Sleeping with you would involve truly and deeply accepting that it's over and done with that other girl, and I'm not yet ready to give up the illusion.

I currently have none of these curses. Come see me, we'll umm.. go get ice cream or ummm something. hahahah :-P

PS, Generally a girl being flirty with me, then making out with me, then looking me dead in the eye and saying 'I want you' will break through these resistances.

Saturday, August 09, 2008 3:38:00 pm  
Blogger Victoria said...

Good points Sir.
It could be any or all of these, I'm now just trying to figure out why Bird won't talk to me about it. AT ALL!
And, no, if you get with a friend if mine in any way? I'm totally not going to sleep with you. And none of my friends would either.
I'm thinking Bird's in column A.

PS Like twisting your rubber arm, eh? ;)

Saturday, August 09, 2008 5:24:00 pm  
Blogger Biddie said...

Mind if I throw in my 2 cents? I am with David on his A point.
I had a really good friend that I slept with once. Just one time. We had known each other since we were 10, and we had all kinds of fun hanging out.
After the deed, things were soo akward. I think that he thought we were going to be in a relationship,and to make things worse, the day after was Valentines Day. He asked me out on a proper date and I turned him down.
Now? Our friendship is so over,and I miss all of the fun that we used to have....

Saturday, August 09, 2008 8:06:00 pm  
Blogger Victoria said...

Oh feel free to throw your cents in Biddie :)
I hear you on the fact that things might become awkward, but we haven't known each other that long. Plus, I'd totally respect that, but dude? TELL ME! lol
Sorry it didn't go well for you... that's no fun. :(

Saturday, August 09, 2008 8:59:00 pm  
Blogger David Maxam said...

I think the 'PS' part has to do with who's taking the responsibility. If she says that, then she is clearly communicating that she is taking responsibility for her own actions. This makes it less likely that there is going to be "he's such a jerk who took advantage of me" blame game later.

Sunday, August 10, 2008 8:11:00 am  
Blogger Victoria said...

Ahhhhh, fair enough :)

Sunday, August 10, 2008 8:56:00 am  
Blogger Elusive Butterfly said...

Okay, I'm not a guy but I have a question. Are you just really horny or do you actually want to go down this road? Or is it just a little bit of "I want because I can't have-itis?" Hmmm, perhaps that's two questions.

I'm not saying you shouldn't, (because, let's face it, I'm not the person to be giving out relationship advice) but you might want to buy a vibrator (see, I recommend the water dancer) before you make this decision. Just think how much gun violence would be prevented if Wal-Mart (USA) had the same policy??

Far too many parentheses. I apologize.

Sunday, August 10, 2008 8:57:00 pm  
Blogger Victoria said...

Heheheheh. You're funny ;)
I think at the time I asked, I was just honestly curious if he would, but then I decided I wanted to go down that road and then the horny hit! lol I mean, not that I'm not able to... uh... take care of myself (ahem) it was more the thought that I might not have to. Ya know? (I'll take a look at your recommendation, giggle) And yes, I'm pretty sure that I'm not going to go down that (this) road.
(No worries about the parentheses!)
(And yes, you should have to think about stuff like buying a gun for at least a couple of weeks! sigh) ;)

Sunday, August 10, 2008 9:15:00 pm  
Blogger Yvonne said...

okay, I'm not a guy either...but is it possible he's gay?!

Monday, August 11, 2008 1:14:00 am  
Blogger Victoria said...

I really don't think so. :)

Monday, August 11, 2008 7:56:00 am  

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