Wednesday, 16 November 2011

Awkward / Honest

A fellow sent me a message on the online dating site the other day and in his message he wished me well whether or not I was interested or responded.

I got back to him to thank him and he asked me an awkward but honest question.

Did I find him attractive enough to pursue things?

There's part of me that appreciates his honesty and his being direct enough to ask.

Where it became awkward is that my most honest answer was "not really", but I didn't want to say that.

I didn't want to say that because it's not nice to hear, and I didn't want to say that because pictures aren't always helpful and it's possible that if we met in person I *would* find him attractive.

So I didn't know what to say. Or how to say it.

So I just kind of said "I don't know what to say to that."

Which is honest.

Just maybe not direct.


How *do* you tell someone you don't find them attractive from just seeing their picture?


Just Sayin... said...

My reply would have been:

"Initially, looks are what get my attention. But it's not what keeps it."

Your answer was honest.
Leave it at that. :)

Miz Adventures said...

Usually something along the lines of "at first glance you don't fit with the type of guys I usually date." I kind of leaves it open for a witty response, which has changed my whole view on people in the past.

Dominic said...

How about "Ewwwwwwwwwwww!!!!!" ? :)

Kas said...

but, but, what if he doesn't photograph well?? I think my husband is sexy, BUT it doesn't come out in a photograph.

I don't think I photograph well. Or maybe I AM really THAT fat....

Solitary Diner (Also Known as The Frugalish Physician) said...

Why on earth would anyone ask that question? That's just asking to have your looks insulted. I don't know what on earth I would've said to him...but I'm usually willing to give all but the repulsively ugly guys a chance, so I probably would've said yes unless he had an extra head or something.

Victoria said...

That's a good way to put it JS ;)

Ooh, yeah, that works too Miz A!

Those thoughts I usually keep inside my head Dominic :) Hope you're healing well.

I totally always keep that in mind Kas, for sure.

'Twas a bit of an odd question SD :)

Anonymous said...

What does "Shallow" mean then? I find that I meet a lot of guys with great personalities, who treat me great, I still go for the ones with so-so personalities who make me work hard and make my heart skip a beat.

Victoria said...

Yeah, I guess I'm hoping to find a great guy with a great personality who treats me great and makes my heart skip a beat all in one :)