Tuesday, 3 April 2012

You Really Are

Street Art Rose by foundimagination
I suppose this will apply equally to real life, but I've noticed that on the blogs I read, people don't tend to see themselves the way I (and I assume others) see them.

I read a few blogs where the people post pictures of themselves and/or themselves and their kids and often the people will say something about how they look extra tired today or how they think their hair/lips/teeth/skin isn't good or something that I'm sure they see, but I don't.

Most of the time I think they look great, or I see something in them they don't seem to have noticed. Or I wouldn't have noticed the flaw they pointed out if they hadn't pointed it out.

And because these people are strangers, it's not like I can just call them up or sit them down and say listen... you're way prettier/handsomer than you seem to think, you really are!

So if I could tell the entire Internet something, or at least the portions of the internet I read and follow, I'd tell it that you're all so so so much better looking than you give yourselves credit for. So stop picking yourself apart because from where I'm standing (sitting, actually) you look great.

And you have pretty eyes and your smile is awesome and I love your freckles and I wish I had your hair and your body is rockin' and you never look tired to me and I wish you could see yourself how I see you.


Dateafrenchman said...

Thanks! Back at you!

Jane said...

Victoria – I love this beautiful post!

I know what you mean - why are we all our own worst critics? I think part of the problem is that we've all been programmed to try to "do it all" and "be it all", and when we fall short of perfection (which we all do), we beat ourselves up. Of course we've all been judged our entire lives by schools, parents, friends, etc. that it only makes sense that we've learned to judge ourselves just as harshly. If we got five “A’s” and one “F”, everyone focuses on the “F”, and so we learn to as well.

It can be very difficult to change this programming and learn to remind ourselves of and celebrate our best qualities instead of focusing on our flaws and shortcomings.

When I was single and having a difficult time breaking my pattern of unhealthy relationships, I went to see a therapist for some advice, and rather than taking me on as a client, he gave me some of the best advice I ever received: that what I really needed was to find someone to be my cheerleader. To remind me of everything I was, all the qualities I possessed that I had such a hard time seeing for myself, instead of all the imperfections and faults that I knew all too well in fine detail (I wrote this post about it on my blog a while back.)
So from all of us who can use such a beautiful reminder of just how little those things actually get noticed, thanks for writing this post.

I wish all of us had a cheerleader like you in our lives to remind us of our beautiful qualities!

Victoria said...

No problemo Datea! :)

A cheerleader sounds like a great idea Jane :)

Just a Girl said...

Ditto :)

Victoria said...


Nithya said...

Beautiful :)

Victoria said...