Memory

When Dad was in having his heart surgery there was what now seems like an enormous amount of time where we just had to wait.

Mom and I went for a walk around Granville Island (we'd decided to stay in a hotel there) while my brother tried to nap in the room.

While we both tried to distract ourselves (game of Scrabble? talk about... something?) I took the occasional photo or two, one of a park bench next to the one we were sitting on, and one of two crows that landed on that same bench a bit later.  Another of a heron standing in the silver water at dusk.

I remember thinking to myself at the time that even when things were awful, there was still beauty in the world, that life was still good.

What I didn't expect, however, is that now, a year and a half later, whenever those photos pop up on my screensaver or background, I'm taken right back to that moment; the waiting, the wondering, the fear.

I often look at photos from when I was a child and wonder if I'm remembering the moment or remembering the photo and making up the moment around it.

Part of me thinks I may have to take these photos out of rotation, to stop bringing it all up again, but maybe not.  Maybe it's just a matter of tricking my memory into remembering that everything's ok now and that I managed to find beauty in a difficult time.

I suppose you could say I "found love in a hopeless place"


2 Irish Boys Sing We Found Love!