Thursday, 10 January 2013

Ellipsis

Before and After the Rain by foundimagination
So, Jay.

I... do not know how to talk about Jay.

It's the strangest thing, because he is constantly in my thoughts, but when I go to try to explain it to anyone, I can't find the words.

Jay understands, I know this much, but I only wish I could share what we have with others.

Maybe I'm afraid to because there are still things uncertain until we meet.  And maybe I don't want to tell everyone just how it is I'm feeling we're feeling because there is still the chance that it won't work out when we do meet.

And maybe I'll feel a little less silly if it doesn't work out and I haven't told everyone how amazing it is right now.

But, just so you know.  It is.  Really amazing.

So maybe I just need time to figure out how to translate that to here.

Maybe I don't have to tell *everyone* right now... but I would like to share it with you.

That's what I'm going to try to do anyway, even if just a little bit here and there.

Ok?

3 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Hi Victoria, I'm happy for you that you have found this relationship. I really hope it works out for you.

I understand what you are saying. My brother met his wife on-line. They have been happily married for, what, 14 years? So things like yours can work out amazingly well.

- Elliott

Thursday, January 10, 2013 9:29:00 am  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

It's a little strange to me that you could feel you have any sort of relationship with someone you've never met in person, regardless of how many words you've typed to each other (or even hours on the phone). I am not judging (trying to understand), I just can't imagine considering anything to be real with someone I've never laid eyes on or even spent a moment with. I think it's impossible to truly connect with someone in cyberspace and it's very easy to develop a false "intimacy" with a stranger online. There is a wall between you; people can say and do a lot of things when they have the protection of a screen or on a telephone line. You cannot know a person until you look them in the eye and spend time in each other's presence. It seems you may be getting a little carried away and putting a lot of hope into something that's not real yet. I don't want to see you get hurt; it seems you have already invested an awful lot of yourself on a big "maybe." Good luck to you. I hope it works out well for you.

Thursday, January 10, 2013 10:25:00 am  
Blogger Victoria said...

Thanks Elliott, I do too :) And, yes, stranger things have happened, right?

Thanks for your comments Anonymous, I totally get what you're saying and where you're coming from. For sure. I am being cautious, we both are, but I'm also trying to enjoy what *is*, and am sharing that joy and excitement here. But, I'm being careful and taking care of myself. But, thanks, I hope it works out well for me too! :)

Thursday, January 10, 2013 4:02:00 pm  

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