Friday, 29 March 2013

So Close, And Yet So Far

He was staying at his friend's place and it made me smile that we were still able to chat, just like we'd done for all those months.

He was feeling a little overwhelmed being at his friend's place, with kids running around and so I hoped that that might make him want to come here, to the quiet apartment, where he would be more than welcome to crash on my couch and I would just be happy for the company.

He said that his friends were heading out for the weekend and had asked him to say and feed the cats, and I was so disappointed. 

Monday, he said.  I have to be in Victoria for a meeting anyway, so we can meet Monday after work.


Two, he said.


Well, he said, you could always come here.

To which, I freaked out.

That, you see, is way, way outside of my comfort zone.  And I tried to explain that to him, that it would mean me feeling like I was trapped there if we didn't get along, and then having to either try to rush back to catch the last ferry, or find a place to stay for the night, and so, no, I couldn't do that.  Couldn't he just come over here for a couple of hours and then go back?  I'd pick him up at the ferries and everything.

He said that he didn't want to do all that back and forth travelling.  Which, is fair enough after having just spent a day and a half on planes and still living out of suitcases, but of course it hurt my feelings.

I had to wait three more days.  Didn't he want to see me as much as I wanted to see him?  Did he maybe not want to see me at all anymore?  Was I being whiny or reasonably upset?  My brain spiralled off into unhappy, anxious, miserable fear land.

It was not so much fun.


Anonymous said...

friends, kids, (cats!!!).....

he is finally so close and as you said he couldn;t come over for a couple of hours and then go back?

i dont konw...give him more time and we ll see...

a friend from Greece. (sorry for any mistakes)

Anonymous said...

Wow, it must have been so hard waiting and wondering and trying to be patient.

Can't wait to see what happens next...


Victoria said...

Hi Friend from Greece!!! :) And, yes, we'll see ;)

It was Michelle! :)