Uh, Yeah....

So last week was hard and this week was even harder.  Worser.

Some of that, unfortunately, was weather related with the freeze affecting work in non positive ways (pipes... they burst.... and then that floods....) and then a snowfall mucking up travel.  The first day was like snow but with ice on top and then more snow and then the second day was sort of unexpected snow and it just all stressed me out so so much.  I asked Jason if he'd mind taking me to an appointment yesterday (I tried to cancel but couldn't) and he's an experienced driver with a 4x4 (weighted down too) and major snow tires and even he got stuck and we slipped a bunch and even though a bunch of places seem to have closed lots didn't (or couldn't) and drivers aren't awesome in this and it just stressed me out way way too much.

This week sucked.  Last week sucked.  I'm hating how I'm feeling right now.  That sucks.

Jason has come over a couple of times to hang out and cook dinner and stuff but even then, I stressed about him driving in the snow.  Stressing about someone else feels really scary because there's this extra layer of "why am I doing this"? because it's not like the anxiety actually helps or fixes or changes ANYTHING.  

Anyway.... babble babble babble, another really rough week and I didn't much enjoy the snow although I tried to admire it and it is nice I guess to be out of the sub zero temperatures. 

The snow should be melting slowly with maybe some rain to help push it away but today will still be iffy driving/walking on the non cleared roads and sidewalks which is pretty much where I live.  So probably another "in" day for me.  Hopefully with much less angst.  I'm really tired of feeling like sh*t right now.  Like, really tired.