Thursday 17 November 2011

Introspective

Photo Op by foundimagination
There's another potential guy who messaged me.

(Ok, I just re-read that and I'm finding it funny. He's a guy, not a potential guy. He has the potential to be a guy I want to date. Um, I think I'm the only one who's finding this funny, let's move on.)

Anyhow, this guy messaged me and he seems attractive, and I like what he has to say in his profile.

What's frustrating me about myself is that I'm already fighting old habits and patterns. I already care too much if I've heard from him or not or where it might go or not go or the whole high-school-I'm-going-to-write-our-names-in-a-heart baloney type stuff.

I *know* better than this and yet it's hard not to fall into that habit.

But I'm trying, I am.

I'm aware, which is at least half the battle, and I'm trying and reminding myself that it's ok to not be perfect and that this too is a learning curve. Just like, apparently, every (damn) other thing in life.

So while I'm excited about this guy's potential (not "this potential guy" heh, heh, heh) to be someone I might want to date, I'm doing my very best to *not* be excited about this guy's potential to be someone I might want to date.

Right now, he's just another guy I'm talking to on an online dating site. Doesn't mean anything other than he read my profile, thought I was interesting/attractive enough to say hi to.

Doesn't mean anything more than that.

Breathe, Victoria, breathe.

(Ok, great, now not only am I the only one laughing? I'm talking to myself. I'm going loopy y'all.)

Man... it's hard trying to change your old patterns and habits.

Seriously.

2 comments:

e said...

That's adorable!
maybe he's thinking the same thing...?

haha! Sorry, I'm just feeding your habit. I do the same thing! I think it's normal.

Victoria said...

Nahhhhhh, guys don't seem to over think things quite the same way we do e! ;)